This is a re-edit of the earlier essay posted at this web log, a bit overdue

This set of bits and pieces of my writing is saved onto a USB drive with the strange name: “believe because it does not really matter supposedly”, and not because I intended to save with that name, but because it just happened by accident of bizarre complexity. But that is what my life is like, and so I kept the file name. Though I must say that over all I disagree with it. But today being 8th May 2007, it is what happened, by accident, and I notice that today I am also not the only person having trouble signing up to open a new Word Press web log.
Computers tend to have a habit in my hands of manifesting strange occurrences which they are not meant to. At times it can be very disquieting, usually bemusing, and always frustrating. Today I am non-committal in this respect. But today I am trying very hard to get myself a new weblog in a more high profile site than where I usually tuck away my writing. Actually, usually I only publish drafts in weblogs, because I value my drafting of the finals to be really needfully well more close to home in the copyrighting stakes. However, the writing in this group is all already well overexposed, and so time for it to become a face of somewhat more prominence than previously. Eventually perhaps that is, but that is all not the point of what this part of my work as a writer is all about.
This set of writing includes an essay which is possibly a bit overworked by now, and forms the bulk of the post. It is the first thing in the post after this introduction.
Then there are some poems, and a bit of social commentary of necessity, but really only so as to not have needed to rework the essay again, and then more poems.
The essay began before Christmas 2006, and was finished as it is here today, with only a few words changed in a quick look through it for suitability to publish at word press dot com, as early in this year as the first few weeks in January. In fact I ordered a set of ISBN numbers and had a full intention then to have printed it out as a paper publication by now. But there was a hiccup. Two actually.
The first hiccup was that I had two other shorter essays, and a whole ream of poems, which all first manifested at around the same few month period, and I was trying to combine them into one single book to a set theme. But I suspect that the combination was flawed at the outset. Not flawed in consistency of intention however, but flawed in assessing compatibility and reader investment. Yet that is as may be, because the other hiccup is far more interesting.
I had been getting followed systematically by police. Well I still am in fact, and have been since I was a teenager. As a teenager I became involved in the Indigenous land rights movement through a local community radio station, 2XX in Canberra ACT, which had begun as a student draft resisters pirate radio station during the Vietnam war. Some years later I became a member of an organisation called Women Against Racism, or WAR for short, in which I met a number of very notable radical political agitators. Most are mostly harmless of course, but one is a person whom might be very dangerous. But the danger did not come from a Kerry Browning whom was framed with firebombing South African diplomats cars. She was let off the charges after proving in court that she had been framed. At the time of her court case we all learned that ASIO, the Australian Security Intelligence Organisation, and ASIS the Australian Security Intelligence Service, and the AFP, the Australian Federal Police, have files on us all, because the existence of those files was exposed in court. When I say all, I refer to all those whom interacted with Kerry. Kerry had been married to a man named Maxwell Nemadzivanani whom was then the Australasian representative of the Pan Africanist Congress of Azania. That was in the late nineteen eighties, and the story of my youth is of getting about as a concerned, worried, and sad girl, who did not want Earth to be in the trouble it is in today, but whom could not care less about having police following her, and was usually oblivious to the fact.
However, in recent years, I have been pressed by the need of a court case of my own, to become less oblivious to the fact of being under constant police surveillance.
The degree of such surveillance is difficult to describe, but the essay I have written makes no bones about it. But that is not in the slightest what the essay is about, but just an interesting sideline fact to its writing. The full fact being that just as I was coming to the concluding period of a massive redraft of three original essays, and a whole set of poems, it happened that the USB drive all my work was in became in the hands of a couple of fellows with Army style hair cuts in the vicinity of where I had been using public library computers. Then I redrafted, and it happened again. Then I put that part of my writing aside for a while. Perhaps it is the paragraphs about the Queen, I mused, that I might need to change to get this work published. But it really did not seem to help.
Then I had a marriage proposal made to me by a stranger, but whom took this situation very seriously as he is a traditionally oriented Aborigine. So my writing changed its course somewhat, and since then I have been drafting poetry faster than I can afford to type and edit it.
This morning I awoke dreaming about putting this essay, as it is, into word press dot com.
I am quite happy about the idea because I have been skirting around the issue of what and when to open my own web log with word press for a while now.
All that remains to be told is that all my writing, when published by my own company, is within the Company’s Trade Mark. So if this work had been my own publication, rather than a Word Press covered thing, thanking Word Press their Copyrighting work for sharing, it will be known as a product of:
“Dreaming Haadjmo’s Dance Time; AManuel,”
a game to play to learn you well,
along with much other of my work designed to become gradually compressed into an educational role playing games for my sons to inherit the ownership of. This part of my work is scene setting, and I write both in poetry and essays of prose, but am still writing at this time, only so as to keep up the record of events I am witnessing unfolding. The eventual aim is to transform our witness into a form which opens up fully how we Indigenous Australians are enabled by our Dreamtime mythology to correlate most events in our witness, with the Prophesies of Revelations, Qur’an, all Mohammed’s Ahadith, and that of any other Prophet. Playing the game of life is what will save Earth.
Apart from that, all that there is to tell is that no person whom I have mentioned, will be able to be identified as real, without me also having mentioned their names here. But if Word Press web logs are not manifesting as accessible by the close of business here in Australia today, perhaps this whole blog will manifest in an other, or a few other context first, and also.

the copyright agreement for this web log is in the comments to the first post of


“Excuse me Mr. Reynolds,
but I am a white Australian who was told
and nobody tells my story yet . . . ,”

This morning I decided to stay in bed and read. I have a copy of Henry Reynolds book: Why Weren't We Told. By 10:32 am I am walking to the bus stop with 97 pages read. I am already too exhausted in my own life story, by my receipt of the stories of my black distant relatives, to be emotionally able to keep reading without writing down my own response. I am a writer and a sole parent and a number of other social constructs which this essay will address. I am not employed as an academic and my writing has consistently worked towards an attempt to consolidate an awareness of the validity of Aboriginal cultural forms of verbal expression as equitably valid a form of scientific study of Human society as are the more commonly utilised verbal formulations. The story I will unfold, as an early response to Henry Reynolds book, will reveal that it is only a matter of time before the Indigenous form of story telling will be gain mainstream academic currency.
That Henry Reynolds has written a story about his own experience of learning to become a historian of the Aboriginal Australian experience is the real public face of the kind of work I am engaging in, simply as my real life story, both within the Aboriginal community and among other white people. Now I am no Sally Morgan, and certainly there are plenty of academics whom precede me and write within the context of history as a social science, but also of their own real life stories. This is the old way of telling history after all, and that which I make no claim as owning the origin of. But what is significant about the new book by Henry Reynolds, and others like it which are recently being published, is that the personal stories of the researchers are being now regarded in the mainstream, as well as in Aboriginal culture, as an essential and integral component of the historic story which those same authors work to present.
We can not recount history without ourselves becoming a part of that history, effecting that history, and so immersing ourselves within the need that our own lives become transparent within that history. This knowledge is become a mainstream ideology in modern Australia, not because of the academics whom understand Aboriginal culture and are working for this outcome, but because of the lives of ordinary Australians. Even if we are still within that Great Australian Silence, thanks to many authors and film makers and radio presenters like Henry Reynolds, the former “cult of forgetfulness” is no longer the fruit of our fathers. (The terms “Great Australian Silence” and “cult of forgetfulness”, are both attributed to Reynolds, H., see exemplified at Viking 1999, Why Weren't We Told.)
This work is a composite of a book review and an introduction to my own writing, as an exposition of why I am writing. The two intrinsically converge. Why I write is why I write in the way I write, and also why the Reynold's story interests me. I am a person who made an active choice. To give to Black Australians the Nobility of never needing to cry out aloud with the pain of what was done to their life. It is theirs. Mine is to tell. In owning this white man's Dreaming, I have owned my pen as a tool for bludgeoning Australians, and any others who will read me. Bludgeoning us out of innate resistance to recognising the reality of the Earth at our feet. Who are we to own the distinction of being Human if we can not own the soil under the hospitals we were born in? Own that terrible story of hospital birth as equitably as the black Aborigines own their own Dreaming. Reynold's work neatly stimulates my own self as a story teller.
I am not going to apologise for my work being emphatically self referential, as my stories explain reason. Just by my being there is reason for this. And any self decent self-referential work, can not exist without being equally deferential. And in that my work must be in deference to the work of the generation which has preceded me, of white Australians who looked to the black man's world. They gave birth to me. Yet that I am self-referential, and that this is also only almost a book review in writing of any approximation to an academic worth, can be reality beginning to define what I am of any academic worth, only as it can gradually unfold by only your own reading being contextually relevant.
Henry Reynolds book “Why Weren't We Told”, postulates the context of me, which I might weave into a cross hatching of real context, through snippets of its convergences with my own Dreaming. This whitefella Dreaming in which we have in common that we Dream a-confronted-whitefella-way, is a Dream in which we share only an oddly similar divergence of experiential certainty. I must commend why the whole Reynold's family should wear my writing well and complimentarily. The fact is that I could not, by any method, weasel out of writing this response to Mr Reynold's book, is a mark that his book is attuned with the esoteric current of Aboriginal Australian work to influence the mainstream.
The stark shock that Reynolds confronted in 1970, as described at the opening of his book, happened when I was only two. It is an ongoing Revelation. I must caution that while we endlessly worked that no more children were ever so incarcerated, the continual situation of unreasonable arrests at Palm Island, is just one of many thorns we must all face. I had a Lover who is is a black man, and inheritor of the Quinkan story here in Queensland, but through His Father whom was from New South Wales.
My friend came to Mosque with me, and made true testimony to His Faith in Islam, in front of the Arab Imam. In truth he was initially motivated by three forces: 1) To help me within His Love; 2) As directed by Black Ulan organised crime; 3) So as to investigate whether I should be a potential murder victim. We should all pretend here not to know the third and second fact, OR the first and second. Leaving a place for the fourth: 4) To be enabled to break through the barrier of Muslim protection surrounding me as recognisable Mujahideen. Gosh, now my story seems unbelievable already, but that is the reality of Islam; and after all, “mujahideen” are defined as the companions of the Prophet whom have proven ourselves to be fully immersed in the religious belief system, that is, in the “Deen” of Islam.
Most often immersed to the extent that Mujahideen are whom seem not to be really Muslim; but to get that you might need to expand your own reading. If Religion is the opiate of the masses, well then I prefer its worth to that of the opium crops Afganistan also exports. But stories of Ali Baba and the fourty theives, or hashish addicted assassins, and other of the thousand and one Arabian nights, are certainly the best starting place for Australians to wonder upon Islamic might, Islamic nights, and what of its worth converges already without own Dreamtime.
My own stark shock is a markedly different one.
My Quinkan Dreaming Lover has recurrent experiences of a real, and painful, stigmata. For those who don't know about this yet, it is experiencing along with Jesus, His crucifixion, in bodily compassion: thorns, nails, and cut in the left side; a set of inexplicable physical symptoms which all began after He became a Muslim. He himself did not recognise what the symptoms were. Oddly the symptoms, which he found extraordinarily painful, were occuring when He was so inebriated with alcohol as to be rendered insensitive to any other sensation. That they occurred also at times when He might have been putting his mind to the Black Ulan commitments he had to fulfill because of family, is a totally irrelevant, just coincidental, fact.
Please bear in mind that his failure in the internal Jihad against alcohol was landing him only knowing his own fault in Allah as his own, and being held in the debt of those Muslims whom his public presentation misrepresents by use of alcohol after he has pronounced His Shahada in testimony to belief in reality. My landing in His Love was to be whom now has to tell for his part also. That is for the telling, His wrongs are accounted as owing only to believers.
Believers in One God, in life, and in our own selves. Believers that it is the black way to withhold the stories which could have boded ill for the future. Believers that He, like I, are being held into a more appropriate, and eventually lesser, account of debts to Humanity, than if we were not become Muslim. But lesser because we are in hijab, is only one small frame of the whole story, and that by which Islam is ever the victor in enabling such wrong blame. Believers also that not enough Australians have been exposed to the truth of why such a man might have sought to become a Muslim. Have I told it straight?
These last two paragraphs are not the only place in this essay in which I make reference to the fact of being Muslim. Yet often in modern Australian contexts, in fact especially that of socialists, I had found my self actively silenced in telling that I believe in Islam. Fortunately there are also socialists whom listen to any persons belief, just the same as a Muslim will listen and absorb what you might already believe in, so as to integrate your belief with their own. Every writer is also engaged in this process, of anticipating what could potentially be any audience disagreement with their own mental processing. There sure are some hearty socialist denials of the intelligence of Islam in this country. Because that is, I would like to provide a little detail to detract from any loss of credibilty my writing could suffer in light of. Thereby, I will not, as I might have, avoid my own beliefs here, but I will depite the Islam which sustains me. Yet I mean not especially in this context to convert you, nor will try to. But I will try to portray what I believe in, withing that thought system you might be more familiar with, and leave open the world of Islam for you to explore in your own way without me blessing you or not in your beliefs. So please then just bear with me in the parts of my writing in which I provide a necessary back drop for you to be able to contextualise me. Contextualise me just the fact that I am ordinarily, in the first instance of meeting with anybody, a plain white Australian Muslim, whom can explain that this status is not insane.
First, there are words from Arabic which are wrongly associated in the internal logic of most non-Arabic speakers. For example: Al-Qaeda is, as well as a criminal front for CIA sponsored activity, the expression of a set of descriptions of the base line beliefs of all Muslims, that is “The Foundations” are not terrorist crime, but a clear scientific description of all that Allah is and is not, and what we each must hold our own self accountable for within that comprehension; Taliban is, as well as a criminal front for world intelligence agencies falsifications about Muslims, a word meaning “Seekers of the Truth”, and describes any Muslim ascetic, and many many of the Indigenous persons of Afganistan whom are dervishes; and a Mujahideen could be anybody, or just somebody like me, but in general is anybody in whom it will be entirely impossible to dissuade from belief in their own responsiblity.
Many many Mujahideen are not showing themselves publicly as Muslims because of the gross and organised defamations of the status. Within the Muslim context, Mujahideen are also those whom are the best of all scholars of Shari'ah, and have proven such by long endurance. The schools existing within Islam were all begun by significant men known as Imam Mujahideen, and can be equated with four, or five, six seven, among the Churches mentioned in Revelations in the New Testament, but depending upon the degree of an individuals Islamic education whether the schools are in fact teaching in the Revelations Prophesy also.
So how on Earth has a normally mainstream white Australian manifested the identification as a Mujahideen Aborigine? Well, I don't know that I can answer that question fully here, since by definition both distinctions are a lifetimes of experiential learning to acquire, but since Reynolds writing stirs the bucket of why that is the truth, I might write around the example of my self, and perhaps also write to prove that you don't need to be a Muslim to be counted as a believer. (There are twelve thousand of us in each of the twelve tribes of Israel, but I will never condemn any individual or race or culture or Religion as being not among us . . . is the clue to the key. The key that is also known, among junkies, as being a sucker. The key to believing. Belief in One God, in your self, and in evidence of Reality, is being a believer, or a sucker if you have a criminal association in mind.) Being Muslim might be only a personal fetish of mine, or it might be an obligation, or a convenience, or a matter of genuine faith. You might never know unless you happen to find yourself also believing in yourself as one among the believers. Yet what you can not know, is not my business, and my business is to give you of my self that which I believe you might be able find beneficial knowledge. So welcome to the first necessity of Islamic belief, that of being able to question what is really able to be believed in. I will advise you to use your own mind's training in science in all of any curiosity which might be stimulated in Islam. Be scientifically critical of my expressions of Religion, but not emotionally negative by having had negative stereotypes of Muslim terrorism been forced down your throat. Don't swallow my descriptions of being Muslim, or of Islamic perception of the world, unless you want to.
I was conceived in the aftermath of the 1967 referendum, born in July 1968, after my maternal Grandfather paid for a 'shot gun' wedding. My parents are seemingly baby boomers, but that was more the orientation of their own parents and their peers, and I have always been a step ahead of the X-generation. Many of my own age friends, orient themselves to the world as members of that younger portion of baby boomers, and also of an X-generation.
Perhaps I am of a whY-generation, enabling that my own children will be able to tell that the world is one/won, of the letter Z, in Tarot The World. Basically my story is that I am who got told. Got told what is wrong with the world. In every way and at every place and in every timing. Why am I? Was the burning question in my mind from my earliest memory. Why Me? Why can I know this things my parents are oblivious to in their efforts to be decent? But to explain how and what that question means, and meant to me at a young age, I really need to tell from within the heart of my own experiences.
There is no other way to answer the question. Yet also no answer exists ever in completion. And still we ask, because it is for the finding that WHY wrong exists exonerates HOW we will be able to repair it. Perhaps it is that Henry Reynolds and my parents quested for how, as how is the most necessary question. Perhaps their eternal wisdom in knowing to know how and let why work itself out is what my will is also. But before arriving at WHAT the solution really is, we know that our children need to be able to learn why those wrongs exist without the intense fear that can surround the terror of how the world has been conducting itself. We only happen to be living in a time when the real “what we need” to complete to survive begs us to be mentally prepared through why as well as that essential immediate how.
'How' is the relativity of feeling, but 'why' is shrouded in the fear that perhaps we already know but are ignoring the truth of cause and effect. Like: 'why' is it that death is? 'What' the solution is to questions like death is already long provided within both Christian and Muslim Religious Prophesy, and long already accepted implicitly by Aboriginal Australia. But liken to the 'hows' and the 'whys', or the 'whys' that are wise, and the 'hows' of Native America, 'what' is a never ending re-learning of the lessons of the past.
'What' is the solution to the ills of the post-modern industrialised destruction of ozone? 'What' is the solution to the questions of biological evolution? 'What' is the mechanism of why we believe what we can possibly believe? In fact we Australians knew the answers to the questions of this time when the Muslims first arrived here, at the height of the Empire of Islam, and soon after some among those first to arrive departed, we knew that they departed in certainty that we are a race already in the sunlight of submission to our own real account in Allah, needing little to resource the process of conversion. But why? Then also why is it that we are not today accepted by the schools of modern Arabic wealth in Islam as equitably Muslim?
The obvious part of that why is because we wear bikinis and are rarely in veil. Then it is that the 'they' among us we fall to, they who tempt us to drink alcohol, they smoke, they gamble, and . . . all those 'they' we might fault with our own selves, are preventing us from the credibilty of being well regarded by oversease interests; but the 'we' I am a part of, we do not like earning interest, and interest is a decisively anti-Islamic habit. These are the questions that my own life quest has arrived at with a thud, and in that the story is one which will need telling. Hang on, wait a minute, how was it again that we are already quite like to being Muslim? Why did a Muslim advisor to the Prime Minister recently tell we are alike already to being a Muslim nation?
When the 'what' we are, ain't in full hijab, despite my own Christmas patchwork print fabric head gear, (not quite Gingham), we might just need to know 'why' so as to know who we are. Islam is the religion of 'why'; but after I posted a draft of this essay into an internal Muslim internet forum writers workshop for initial feedback, that feedback I first received was a American black power consciousness vote that my credibility is in the impossiblity of my reality having become born.
So here at 23rd July 1968, in the wake of the admonishing of flower power to the Americans, in favour of small town Australian rural orientated lives of poachers of the vote, I got born into a snow storm early in the morning, and was exuded from my mother so fast as to land on my head on the hospial floor only just out of the ambulance door. As unlikely as any Alien landing.
Let me identify my self within the legacy of the generation of my forebears who encouraged me toward an identification that is now my public personality, as a communist, a black-lover, and a radical alternative nobody in particular, and essentially at heart a very conservative bothersome, public vote. Well, I should say that by the time I was old enough to think for my self, even though Mum had said that the Communists caused that there were not starving babies in China, and that in Russia men were paid by how many children they feed rather than by the social strata their skills accorded, I never quite openly identified as an actual Communist, because that would have been social suicide in anybody's book by the time I was a teenager in the 1980's. Not to say that I am not and/or have not been, a card carrying member, of some group or other or two.
But in 1987, with a record of having been unemployed for then only just long enough to count as a long term unemployed person, and so a potential social problem, even though less than one year out of year twelve in the ACT, I landed a job at a Community Radio Station under the Commonwealth Employment Programme, and received a rapid re-education from the oldies who had begun the station as draft resistors radio in the late 1960's and early 1970's. From there it was only a hop step and a jump over to the local Trades and Labour Council conference at which, being a nobody in particular without any sectarian affiliations, I was voted to become the convenor of the ACT Bicentenial Protest Group. My real education had begun in full consequence.
The first job that radio 2XX sent me out independently to cover was a public lecture given by Michael Mansel, then recently returned from Libya. The other speaker, whose name I will not mention since he has subsequently passed away, was an individual whom I had already begun to receive somewhat of an education from in his stories of the stolen generations, which my help to disceminate the oral rendition of, as the volunteer PA operator for a public protest for, had lead into my gaining employment at the radio station. That is, the former Husband of Eleanor Williams who was also the first black Australian published Playwright. Also that individual whom first formally recognised me, and welcomed me into the Kinship of Aboriginal Australia as an identified Aborigine by ancestry. That was in 1988, a few days short of the 200th anniversary of the invasion.
I guess that perhaps a portion of why I will regard my writing as significantly worthy to be openly exhibited in its early stage of my development as a writer, as this is, is because I read things that make me aware that my own constant point of veiw is amply evident in its lack of portrayal. I find small example in Henry Reynolds work which exemplifies this. He writes that his wife was, in her work, as a mother in Townsville, just simply unable to protect her children from witnessing that the black population were “poor fellas”. Just that, just that fact alone, of growing up in the stream of consciousness of knowing that it is wrong to discriminate against any person on the basis of colour of skin or belief system, but when bearing witness to the treatment of black Aborigines is no longer possible to avoid, we are, as a generation, forming a mainstream awareness of horror, and of our need to question why. Margaret Reynolds was certainly motivated beyond any ordinary of motivation to speak up on behalf of the black community to change the balance of power. Her children's voice is that still in need of expression.
Children confronted with such contradictory situations as the Reynold's book describes, form adult minds which need to find a new way to reconcile the real world. I guess most folk mask that horror with money, but as a white Australian whom learned to identify with the black history, and then later factually with my own black, fading into passing-as-white, Aboriginal ancestry, that option was always closed to me. Now, even if I receive any money, I will not clothe myself in it, but probably still prefer a cuppa with the homeless folk on the streets, to a cuppa in the Hilton. My awareness of danger is so acute that I feel equitably endangered in the Hilton as when surrounded by those who live off the handouts from charity street work 'vendor' vans. I am brave that I write.
Brave clad in hijab hiding dreadlocks woven with feathers. Brave enough for reason. One reason is because there are those forerunner academics, like Henry Reynolds, whom might just provide the initial audience that I need. Academics like the International Socialist Organisation Politics lecturer in Classical Marxism, who read my essay that is a Marxist analysis of, the changes in midwifery and obstetrics which underpin the attack of control of the means of production in speed of reproduction, against the working class, and whom then provided the verdict that the subject warrants post graduate research. By such individuals having paved the way in the mainstream, I learn that my innate intelligence is a counter to my actual immediate personal presentiment. I might be only a dull prostitute if you meet me. Prostituting only my feet.
Another reason I write has continually stood in the way of that sort of life story in which I could be writing as an employed academic. I really and truly got mixed up a bit deep in black business back in 1988, so deep that there is no route of return, and never has there been. Perhaps that is what the real terror then is, that terror we learn when fully questioning why, the terror of what is it that blacks know that whites refuse to see?
But don't misinterpret what I mean by “black business” and “too deep”. Really just deep enough, and just black enough, and in business, that of working through the world of white racists attempts to corrupt the work of black Australians, so as to prevent and expose such. It's an unusual role for any white person to advocate. Unusual to find any acceptance within among the black community, but actually very usual functionally as a white person with any conscience.
One of the more unusual aspects of my life story is that I began to speak when I was only six months old. I was being read to frequently and can even now remember dreams from that age in which a local Aborigine kid with fair skin, whom I had met through my mother attending a local preschool with me in her arms, was telling me what was what. He is now one of the wisest adults I have ever met, and condemned wrongly to a life of being branded with insanity, because after being stolen from his mother, he tried to tell everybody in 1988 that he is an Aborigine, but nobody would believe. He taught me to speak in reality. The alphabet book I was being read to from by adult neighbours, told “N is for nigger”.
One day, being myself, and seeing a black man walking past the front of our house in Armidale NSW (the same street which now houses the Aboriginal Medical Centre), I pointed to him and said naturally “nigger”. Of course, it was much to the embarrassment of every adult connected with the event. So I had an early formative experience of certainty in the fear between persons of different colour, and certainty that the books we were given are not telling it like it is. Not to mention that my mother always stared at “the blacks”.
We were warned not to behave in that same way as the visible destitute blacks, warned and warned and warned, (and warned), but warned to the extent that I eventually discovered myself more at home with a drunken mob under the bridge in Cowra than in my parents home. So why was my mother staring all the time, and WHY was there a photo of a black woman in the old family photo album. Why was the Bible with the names of these old people kept seperate from the photos, and WHY DID MY NANA TELL ME NOT TO LOOK AT THE BLACK WOMAN OR RISK GROWING A NOSE THE SAME SHAPE, just as she her self had. Are we warning ourselves not so show that we are whitefellas whom are a racial anomaly among a black race, or are we warning ourselves not to become too afraid of the worst that is, and rather just let it all happen to us, just as our not too distant black relations will let the world unfold in their minds, not as it is wanted, but as it is.
Meanwhile I have gained a strange sort of credibilty as a white who hangs out with the drunk blacks without drinking, and is accepted. They all know that a sniff of the stuff is enough of that poison to wound me. "They" is 'they' as in the black consciousness of my locality, among whom there can be no pretence that I am one of; but yet one counted in among the same race. A race in which to be a whitefella is tantamount to a declaration of being pure evil. After all, while the Quinkin, whom might be helpful in their naughy ways, are one thing, the Jungari are another altogether, and are the white of. Like a migaloo. The black power way of the white skin story, is to accept that label without being so ignorant as to be a real migaloo.
I should here diverge from my mental associations into the Arabic word kafir being that same in meaning, not white of skin, but of mind less able to find constance of being a responsible life. Folk who see the world with black eyes see them as actual ghosts, and that is a great majority of the population whom can manifest in actual external appearance so like, to the eye of a believer whom knows what they are seeing. To me, they are just sort of incompleted lives because my mind will work to define them by story. They are stories which never go anywhere or mean what is real. There is a scientific definition of what a kafir, and kafr/kfr/kafar, is, but let it rest for its terror is real, and defining the imagination is not. Imaginations are not meant to get up out of the grave and walk around causing cultural revolutions to dishearten socialists, but if anybody can imagine themselves into becoming wealthy, why then certainly this is a plausible position.
Are you yet questioning what I am, and if I am either real? Are you really reading this, or is it your Dreaming?
Either way, not to worry too much, because the illusory world crumbles in the long run, wether we identify as Socialists or Muslims or Indigenous, we all know that.
The essence here of the story I am telling is that I had no need of the shock Reynolds describes so well, of having been brought cautiously and tentatively into the reality of black Australians lives, only to have been revealed to in starkness the full depravity of that reality in one fell swoop, by witnessing children being emprisoned as adults only for swearing at school teachers. The fact of my birth alone seems to be quite the shock needed, that already I became a sponge to any such story, well before I encountered Henry Reynolds book Frontier.
Yet the full extent of that shock is deeper still than only one book mentioning one instance of imprisonment of children. It is the shock that many already know and conveniently forget. That shock of certain constant facts of the invasion of Australia, within the context of all the world of what accorded that the British ever built an empire. That the British brought criminals to Australia whose descendents are free, while the descendents of our Indigenous ancestors have been incarcerated at rates which call Australia under the limelight of United Nations enquiries into Human rights abuses, is that shock of Terra Nullius still active.
Please, Mr. Reynolds, but thanking your work, some of us are now growing up knowing. I know that my own shock in that knowledge has been so deep that I would not have recovered without The Ummah, that is, the Kinship of Muslims whom are committed to working among the world’s Indigenous people. (Being in The Ummah, is, in Arabic, like saying among Gurindji Kinship, or among Wiradjuri Kinship or Nungunnawal Kinship, it sort of means being with the ablity to be in one mind with the whole of collective Human worth as you yourself are able to accurately identify Humanity, but being only in that portion of that one mind which is your own small cog in the mechanism of all subconscious thought: Mecca is a veritable automatic remote control emotional support system which is as tight as the best family love. The power of place to reconcile our collective subconsciousness and collective conscious prayers, is the real might of Islam that will be inevitably proven to be impossible to harm.) Still today, far too few of us Australia are enabled to face the full strength of reality in what has happened, and is still happening in many places to Indigenous Australians, at the time of this writing. The shock of prosecutors going against coroners reports in prosecution of police known to have murdered a black man, is very real for all of us this very day. What do the police expect, that they can only be guilty of crime if they managed to extract pleasure out of the depths of a black man's liver? Don't they realise what is happening during death to men all around the planet at this time, but most especially to men whom believe in Allah. In writing these words about such shocking truths existing, as men's livers broken into pieces in police custody, I mean to contribute to that which prevents, and if you will read further you will know that we have the means when we take our own beliefs seriously. But not without the belief of many. The safety of being among very very many whom are inculcated from infancy into accomodating terror and love in one, is very real. It enables that a shock is scarring but not permanently wounding.
The full strength of the shock is, in the British legacy, inclusive of the Robin Hood Dreaming. Maid Marion was the daughter of a Muslim Governor, Saladin, whom was provided to King Richard for Peace. Yet provided within a certain condition, a condition spread by that marriage into all the English aristocracy around all whom they ruled over, but most especially around the girls whom are believers; and which, the conditions established by Terra Nullius broke emphatically, as soon as all Aborigines became recognised as Citizens of the Commonwealth of Australia, and lesser already only through the failure of acknowledging a war of invasion. A 93% majority victory fourty years ago May 2007, is proof not of that war, but proof in deed of the fact that the British regarded Aboriginal Australians as their subjects, but still broke their condition made with Saladin.
The neat coincidence here is in the Arabic meaning of the name Saladin, and the inimical fit its meaning has within Aboriginal culture. The British made a group of pre-existing Muslims their subjects, and failing to notice that our ancestors naked blackness was hijab, they condemned us as they had promised the might of all Islam, at the closure of the crusades, that they never would. Every Muslim effort to prevent such things as Human being children becoming wrongly accused, has up until now at least, mainly focussed upon American Indigenous worth. I guess that American's saw it coming and lined themselves up so as to receive. Within that constant Muslim work by each individual to prove that their own culpablity is not in the preventing of any Indigenous world from acquiring Islamic education, there was an effort made to avert Prophesy, and in that, have all Prophesies been proven. Yes, my fellow Australians, bless Mohammed because he told the Arabs that we are, and that inevitably an outcome exists, in which they are to be imposed upon to swallow this whole present situation, and did begin to all of fourteen hundred years ago, not for oil or blood, but for their own salvation. Insha Allah I am not wrong in this.
Why I found my way into modern Islam was through the methodology of Islamic scholarship being able to give me a measure in which I can begin to analyse and express 'why', as cause and effect, without wasting my self upon delusions of blame. Islam in the Arabic language, is the Religion of WHY, and having been as much a student of comparative Religion, as of Aboriginal Australia, and politics, and medical science; I can qualitatively verify this statement. Arabic oriented Muslims are generally streaks ahead of the rest of the population in scientific education, and all of the discoveries of the Enlightenment in Europe were originally found through Crusaders acquisitions from Muslimsi. In fact, the whole matter was most definitely Prophesied by Mohammed.
Most Australians of any real worth can distinguish that many Muslims are not the good guys; but it is only from in among the Ummah of Islam, that a few distinct facts become obvious about why us Aborigines are not automatically becoming Muslim reverts when encountering Muslim Sheiks and Muftis and Imams. Once in the Ummah it is clearly not because of any Muslim identified bad guys, whoever they are, that we Australians are not embracing the identification of modern Muslimahs. In the Ummah nobody can hide, yet everybody has the shelter of maybe being the worst of all men, but never being assumed to be, so we all presume of one another at least. What holds it together is essentially only the shared belief, even for those whom are not believing. So can I answer your askance of this sort of 'why' while you are not yourself a Muslim? Why are there disputes among Muslims as to whether to count Australian Aborigines as already Muslim? Why is the True Law which the Bark Petition was adherent to, not validly recognised as, in truth, Shari'ah, that it is. The recent film Ten Canoes paints that plain. Why is it that even those Muslims whom accept that most Australian Aborigines were already Muslim, (only those whom failed to win their own internal Jihad are not), are supposing that blessed Mohammed's Prophesies are, in the not too distant future, applicable only to indigenous Americans; but when the application of those Prophesies to contemporary Australian Aboriginal life is the only way to sustain evidence of perspective of relative innocence and positive future consequence, while knowing that there is a hole in the Ozone and global warming. Innocence from having done such things as the hole in the ozone layer, and the greenhouse effect, every time we turn on a light switch. Relative is related to each our individual consumption offset only by acceptance of the indigenous attitude of relation with land and flora and fauna, as being of our own self also. Don't get me wrong here, it is not, as a few have accused me, that I want to claim to be Indigenous only to be able to acquit my own self of such crimes at a lesser rate; but it is, rather, that I know that being indigenous is being able to train the mind into full acceptance of the real consequences of over consumption.
But then why is it that many Muslims are just not comprehending why an Aboriginal Australia is already a Muslim? Are we Australians, Aboriginal identified and otherwise, just too far well tempered to the problems of terror, or never yet learned in? Or it is the power of the Prophesy of our inevitable underground supremacy? Are be being done a massive favour by being disbelieved? If that is the case, I can assure you, that only who will every be truthful about ourselves can receive. Those whom wantonly portray themselves as the oppressed, whenever there is any other available option in life, accept being causal to their own distress. Hear me in this strong, you can not know what is wrong in me, with me, around me, and to me. You can only know your own experience of me, your own vulnerability to my influence, and your own beliefs which concurr with me. Whatever you regard for the modern Muslimahs, you will be a fool to blame Islam, while now even among Israeli Jews are men converting for Peace.
You might well be able to regard Islam as almost totally irrelevant to your life and your considerations of issues such as Land Rights and Justice for Mulrunji, but you can consider my position at least in the following facts of a Judaic inclination. Has the Human genetic changed radically since the Israelites walked out of Africa? There is recent scienctific evidence pointing to the reality that biological evolution is a more rapid process than was previously supposed. We are certainly not often these days proving we can live on pure Mana. Is it only that we have become lazy in remembering how little we need to live by, since diaspora has been effecting how well we each are learning to remember our individual accountibly as a single unit of life among all other living beings, (that is, how well we are remembering our self in Allah). What might this mean in connection to the reality of Australian Aborigines genetic make up being that only of a complete race whose genetics contain the genome picture of every other race? What did the invaders do to their own future continuity in life when they smoothed a dying pillow? There is a teaching about the seven types of person whom are shaded in their own account in Allah, or as seven sorts of maytr, and Aborigines of Australian equate within those teachings as an eighth racial sort, in the full light of eternity, knowing each our own fate and blessing our means to that knowledge, as individual as our own lives. Essentially, am I correct in being certain that among Aborigines quite some many are living off mainly mana? If we have to use money, bless every example in which we don't have to have it for food. Is the current climate of difficulties in multiculturalism, a race to be first to know, or a race to be first to walk that passage through Prophesy in to reality being realised.
These questions have immediate currency among academically minded Muslims. But not to most Muslim scholars ablity to merit any other scholar, unless able to include reference to a founded belief in the Prophets, as the basis upon which to make any empirical investigation. Prophets including those of the Jews and of course Jesus. Empirical investigation because, why would anybody try to prove what is not yet existing, if such efforts could be causal to it becoming, meaning that of course there has always been a guaranteed positive social outcome at the heart of being Muslim. The relevance of empirically proven Prophesies, is of course not at all relevant to whom is not provided any context for realising that Prophesy exists. Justice for Mulrunji, might factually be aided by comprehension among Australians, of why the whole Palm Island situation can be regarded as portionally the fulfilment of a Prophesy. But beware of trying to take individual advantage in being Prophesied about, because there is a Prophesy of that very situation being causal to the terror which is, at this time, inflicting the Arabs.
I should here make one point plain in respect of ablity to readily adopt any new story into the Indigenous culture. There is ethnographic evidence of Islam having entered the Top End of NT, via Macassan fishermen, in the Morning Star story. This evidence I have read in Islamic sources, placed as the only evidence of any Islam among Aborigines. There ignoring those devout Muslims, like Jack Akbar, whom married Aborigines believing us to be believers in Islam. The story of his marriage to Lally, published in the book Linden Girl, is fairly well renown, but what is not well renown, is that the circumstances which caused their eventual seperation have been repeating throughout Muslim management of the Iman of Australian Aborigines. A timing difficulty arises if a Muslim man can not realise what we are as Aborigines. Our way can be described as the Magi, or a shapeshifters, depending upon whether you want to honour us in it, but usually needs for a Magi Imam to time it. This is a lesson I had to learn the hard way. It is that lesson which, until learned and taught, has been preventing Muslims from noticing that if we knew in the top end, about that Mohammed blessed, then we all knew, perhaps with the exception only of Tasmania. So why was it a Tasmanian whom went to Libya then I must wonder?
Regardless of which, it is the treasure of all Humanity in Islam, that Qur'an conveniently began as an series of perfectly woven stories interlocking neatly with all Indigenous stories in every part of Earth. I ain't only saying that because I am a Muslim, but I tell it out of my own constant wonder in such facts. I know us Mossies can be intolerable with the dogma of Praise-Allah-for-all-worth, but if you ever find out why, be no other way than yourself, in any language you may speak. (Mash'Allah for there is plenty, even though I do not know the Arabic for the whole phrase, and only occassionally awake finding I have been Dreaming in Arabic, or an Indigenous language.) If you just praise natural providence of every living creature, simply for the fact that you are continuing to breath, then even without any Muslim education, you are in that moment in Islam. Surely our whole species is so destruco-mad that you can not be assuming of yourself to the extent to suppose you yourself know what is manifesting our continuance? Thereby, in that fact, you have to admit, that Islam is nothing if not also a very neat mind trick: but one which is by design for the purpose of combatting the tricks and treachery which trick us out of facing each other or reality. In Islam, the only thing you can be tricked into is reality, and reality is the whole game. The games of wealth and riches and the corridors of power, what is it which makes you want to work only for Allah rather than your own pleasure? That a Prophesy of Shepards ruling from tall buildings exists, bodes well for us Socialists, but who will it be, and can we really know? The serious study of Prophesy leads the mind into witness of miracle undoubtedly, and if it were not for such experiential evidence, how could we trust that life will continue. This is the cause of every real Indigenous Initiation Tradition, and always has been.
From Adam and Noah through Moses to Abraham and Jesus, Muslims are only whom believe in God while noticing that Mohammed's Prophesy is, by definition, when fully comprehended, the description of the worst it is possible for us to ever need to bear with as our own account, (that is, in Allah), our own account for the responsibility of being alive. In general the Prophets are individuals whose real worth is only that of any living recall of credible outstanding lives which have been a referential story for their descendants. They are individuals of equitable meaning to those individuals whom Aboriginal cosmology references belief, and recognises as the Ancestors whom made the place be as it is today. Equitable in deed and living recall, are Byaiame, Pund-jel, and Nagacork, to David, Solomon, and Mohammed. Allah bless them all. The advantage of the Prophets of the Arabs is only that of the legacy of the written word. Only because of the writing legacy, they were booned the clearest of the Prophesies. There is a fact, of no small account, in which that legacy will prevail. That the seal of Solomon is one which will hold all men, and also the Jinn, to word. The concept of The Jinn, is one which is the grounding of how Islam will orient into Australian belief systems. While you might not yourself believe in such things as Genies in lamps and Ifrit who scare men whom visit prostitutes, let me commend to you that my pen is able to influence at least how you are able to regard yourself as a life story existing within contemporary urban mythology. Not because of you needing to your self embrace Islam, but simply because I am my self an existing social phenomenon.
A phenomenon of being who can happily empirically relate the work of the people of the book, to the lives of we who are of only our land, so far as to know that the 'people of the book' are not only those born to the fertility of a promised land between the Tigress and Eurphrates. Our milk and honey might be termites and spinifex, but we are proving not to have needed to be who reads and writes to be among those whom most clearly define that there is empirical evidence of the book of time and prophets.
The truth about my stopping reading the Reynolds book at page 97, now yesterday many days ago, is that I could not bear the fear in my self of reading another portion of another historic document which referred to Aborigines as Godless. Just that it was too much for that day without being able to express an objection. The sounds of the words by which Indigneous Australians are caused to remember the fact God is, have no need to be perfect for us to re-join in the perfection that is everything of created life.
Perhaps Aborigines have always had different words for God, since the tower of Babel indigenous folk everywhere, different from each other region by region, learned to speak differently from one another, only so as to prevent that strangers know we are real, real in speech about the sacred. The linguistics of Dreamtime language are different from linguistics of daily speech precisely because the seal of Solomon, of enforcing honesty upon pain of death, is then in place. In modern Australian life there are communitists and scientists and public servants who believe in God but have never been provided the social means of entry into any community of those whom are like minded in percieving God. Yet knowing the language of the sacred is not what defines belief. Oddly enough, often those of us whom were believers without being able to express our belief, have been those with remote Aboriginal ancestry. I wondered why for a long time. Along with more general wonders about why the Dreamtime myth equivalent to the tower of Babel story feels to have been such a very recent story here, only a little preceding the British invasion perhaps, and perhaps it never was among those communities in which all children commonly are learning to speak anywhere from 9 to 13 distinct languages. When you have been told, you just can't help but wonder. Why this difference? Why me? Why am I able to find out when nobody else around me? Is it only that there is a currency of genetic birth right which causes that presentiments of Dreamtime reality seem always closer in mind, than can the mythology of India or Persia or those further distant northern lights, while the Animist faith in Africa has a larger range of beast than we might like.
When I was nineteen at the commencement of the Bicentenary of the Invasion of Australia, I happened to be catching a lift to Sydney, with another person from the Bicentenial Protest Group which I had become the hapless convenor of. She happened to know about a met up in Mittagong of another car of feminists from Canberra, driving the Rape Crisis centre bus, who were to await meeting with the convoy of Traditionally Oriented folk whom had been on the road for weeks from the Kimberly and other parts of WA, NT and SA. The convoy had received media coverage but little to my own perception then of consequence. I was still in that oblivious mental state of being “convicted by the spirit”as they say; that is, I was suffering from a prolapse that quite prevented my noticing most of what was being communicated on the best of days.
We met some other folk waiting at the Uniting Church in Mittagong. I felt like staying to wait, and another traveller felt like departing, and a vehicle swap was made without my having much effective input. So I was there when the convoy arrived, and seem to have, miraculously, changed the whole course of my life. God bless all those whom caused that my own initial shock out of mainstream white culture, was not as Reynolds describes, witnessing children in distress, but it was rather being suddenly in a small white minority among a large and overwhelmingly loving and supportive group of Traditionally Oriented Aborigines from remote Australia. The only other time I had met such people was buying a shirt from a travelling group of women from the Utopia Batik group, whom came to my school, perhaps I was wearing it then in Mittagong. I certainly remember that its strange, familiar and unfamiliar, smell was only of black sweat, and that the shirt had made me already familar with the smell of these people in whose care all my Dreams have been ever since in the trust of.
I am truly blessed as a white Australian because that is a smell which has become synonymous in my mind with safety. The safety of being able to be true to my own self. I have learned only many years later that I was a bit of a prickly pear of an incongruent self whom not many could gauge. My self, as it was then, and is now, splattered with all sorts of bizzare and awful social regard. I guess I am only by now a bit more used to being me, and certainly had to become far more knowledgeable about being me before that prolapse could mend. At nineteen, and having become socially obliged to join the Indigenous black minority population in boycotting the Bicentenary celebrations which most of my pre-exising peers, and all my close family, were looking forward to the fun of, how could my life not have changed dramatically.
In the longer term it has become clear that most of my white peers whom also boycotted are also of Aboriginal Ancestry. But we didn't know back then, not at first. And in truth I needed a second shock before I could my self fully realise. The shock of realising that the Ummah of Islam exists and has shaped, and is continuing to shape, the entirity of Human life. Once in the centre of esoteric Islam, the perspective is clear: its methodology, which is so alike to that of criminality, is for the reason that we are all existing immersed in the world of the criminal mind. A fact which has not escaped all life of real Aboriginality.
After meeting with the convoy we all had a night at Mittagong highschool courtesy of the Uniting Church, then drove on to La Perouse in Sydney. The Convoy seperated into two sections on the way into Sydney, and I just could not help a creeping feeling that the vehicle we were in was responsible for that mistake. But I can swear that it was not my fault. It was Tanya McConvil's beer cans which fell out the door when we opened it to find out what direction to take, and it was Tanya who reviled that anybody sought to ask what our mistake had been because it was Tanya whom didn't want the police to know about the marijuhana in the bus that day. I expect it was neither Tanya's fault. Everybody was either stoned, or like me and the driver, playing it dead straight. I will mention Tanya only because her name and face are known and knowable as an English woman already within the Gurindji Kinship system. She has an odd and unwaranted reputation for being the face of the far left wing's realisation of the Land Rights polemic. But she might just be an old drunk who is strategically placing herself to find out what direction might get her out of any culpablity for Islamic Prophesies. Europe of full and brimming with that legacy of the crusades. That's what I reckon any how. But you never can tell either with us Mussie Gubborigines, we might as well all be the nazis.
Regardless of any of which Tanya is who had told me that the old women in the convoy were going to make it rain, and that it always rained when they did that. Search me as to how the convoy becoming split into two manifested a rain storm. I just can't tell when it comes to that level of Indigenous Science. But in truth, I knew Tanya as a woman with a degree in Nuclear Physics whom never says that a group of people can cause it to rain, unless she is herself totally convinced that this is what will happen in every single circumstance, and that she herself has tried to prevent it, but failed. I learned very directly from Tanya, so named after Russian Peace work, by her English communist party heritage, but my most important lesson in Peace yet, is not to blame war. Neither will I blame Tanya for her drunken exclusivity about her wherewithall among Indigenous Australians. Our collective pride grants me that my own wherewithall, not among the academics and Elders, but among the street drunks, is in an odd equivalence. To Tanya's white poverty and substance abuse, among the best educated in the black community, I am a well educated sober Aboriginal white among the black drunks. Thanking whose efforts caught me that lift.
At La Perouse I was given that important handshake welcoming me into the Ummah of Aboriginal Australia by the playwright I earlier mentioned. I was shy and dumbstruck, but feeling certain that special and important things were afoot and that I was strangely specially enabled in witness of these events. I didn't really display any culture but remember being sensitive to there being a whole set of rules at work which I had no idea as to, and so I could only be carefully minded. I knew that I really really really did not like being white among blacks, and also that I liked being among blacks. This essential internal difficulty took many long years to resolve.
I was invited to the corroboree on the eve of the 26th at Kurnell. I only knew that it was about making the old way strong again. I slept through it. I got laughed at because I was very obvious in being well attuned with Kinship, but within my own internal inablity to know that I am already in that pattern of Indigenous Ummah. I was openly behaviourally adherent, but internally mentally oblivious. A typical whitefella. I remember even wondering if everybody was laughing at my thoughts, but wondering in the internalised white fella way of forgetting to remember that my wonderment is open to that very phenomenon. Yet this speaks to a critical difficulty in modern social relations between black and white. And it is the exact difficulty that my experience of the Corroboree has set my life permanently upon a road of recovery from. How can we reconcile in Kinship when we mistake each other by colour of skin and colour of internal cultural regard, or get these two things mixed up. Both black and white skin persons have white and black cultural practises, and both English oriented culture and Aboriginal culture sustains also internal distinction between black and white in cultural practise more overtly than in colour of skin. These things are overtly taught in Islam.
What I have learned in Islam is in connection with what makes us different from each other, so as to sustain being in common Humanity. We are different racially because of 'how', as in, by what specific sin in collision with sins of hate, are adept and holding one another to account. We each also have specific skills in working specific patterns of accountiblity such that we are not in sin, and these accord individual biological differences also, like about those blacksmiths which Charles Darwin pointed out. But these sort of functions, like the difference of mind between a fisherman and a shepard, are still not in essence the difference we experience of Tribe, which is more aligned to the twelve tribes of Israel. Then finally also what is our skin that we are born in, and which normally illustrates the shape of our bones, and our immediate mental attunement capacity, our Dreamline affliations are everything in communication. I am a Nungarrayi of the Tribe of Juda, and might hold you to account in any way since I am an Aborigine.
English culture has a specific structure in which Kinship is not of the conscious mind. I was raised in that structure, yet conscious of that structure, where others I was raised alongside were not. I am sure that this is a familiar story for many whitefellas of indigenous ancestry. That internally noticing of being in a culture of interior comfort from oblivion. Supposedly, that is, we are meant to take comfort in not knowing, but in reality it is immensely discomforting to be noticing the world in ways that your ablity to notice is being denied. We white Aborigines have been inculturated as though we are all really migaloo. But the most common method for us whitefellas to become busted out of our internal oblivion is through drug use. Drug use that inevitably only reinforced the migaloo state. It should only take one single use of a drug such as marihuana, if in the company of blackfellas in good Kinship, whom should be able to provide amply that essential evidence of our collective connection in mind, but they don't, they laugh instead, and I sure have been long laughed at. In fact, I am certain that the Aboriginal public radio broadcasters found my really very funny when they got me stoned a few times in the following twelve months following January '88, and me, I was in that prolapse remember. But I truly believe that the tent embassy has worked somewhat to remedy their way since I was there in 2003, and wrongly believed to be insane because I was just a bit faster of mind, but white.
Realistically the impetus for busting any person out of their English speakers culture must come from that person, but “I know they are laughing at me and I don't get why” as a mental conjecture, really is the signal of that impetus being needed. The prolapse I had, from 1972, until 2002, needed eventually for an Islamic text to cause me to reach that level of certainty-in-inevitablity required. Clearly I had a big step to make, much to swallow that was not my fault, and had our common place Aborigines ability to gain impeccable self knowledge while in the prolapse state. That being the key to any Rainbow Serpent Story, that I am the Land, and it me.
The really sad thing I learned is that those whitefellas (and occasionally, but far less often, blackfellas among) whom: regularly use drugs; and often sell drugs to Aboriginal youth; and are really always only using drugs so as to bust themselves out of any culture which might cause them to believe in their own self, and own accountiblity; and not actually looking for an Indigenous culture which regulates internal acknowledgement of collectivity; are most often those whitefellas whom the black youth are orienting towards as able to communicate with blacks. This is the hard fact in which my bludgeoning is really beginning. Who the culprits are, are the food for who catch them, which might be why Aboriginal youth are so gravitating, but not often enough successfully to make it worth while. Even worse is that many of the worst of racists are long already realised this fact about black youth and are using it to further strip down the retention of traditional culture that is sustained among urbanised black populations. This is the critical fact which Government funded drug and alcohol programmes are not attending to, but rather too often are reinforcing. We can not manage such work without strong retention of culture.
I for one am an advoate of Islam as the only real way to re-enter Aboriginal tradition with any success, because in Islam we can learn that which we should have found out by traditional initiation, which is the knowledge essential to be safe among any wrongdoers. My own return to Aboriginal tradition is hard but essentially enjoyable, and it has well patterned steps which I have laid for others to follow. Hopefully soon also a success in court. My steps have been through well known standardised Intiatory practises, but unusually found. First a Rom, then childbirth, then experientially structured learning as needed, then the full teaching found through Islamic literature, as though in the fuller Rom. The only problem being that I never got the becoming a woman step yet, because of a series of errors between Muslim and Aboriginal timing.
Within Islamic teaching I can percieve that it is those whom believe in occultist pracise, among white culture, whom, through modern Churches and Rosicrucian based ideas and dreams, are factually culpable for reinforcing the delusions of what culture might have been, among vulnerable Aboriginal youth. But I haven't had much immediate effect in preventing such while I am standing alone amid the problem calling out: “Hello, over here you guys, I'm straight and I know! But I don't even pretent to let myself be blamed only because of having white skin. Sure you can take advantage of me in the fact that I have been over to England, any Dreams about English way that you need, and I am happy to regard my self as in your obligation, if you are black. But really this white skin, I am taking it to my disadvantage on a daily basis already in enough different contexts. And if you need a whitefella to get you in any metaphorical doors then I am an adept mental locksmith. Come for a walk through the city with me, to see what I can see, surely thats a better way than to hang around with a bunch of druggies who let you blame them and intend to take it all back one day, because they sure as hell are getting more out of blaming you for blaming them, than you every get out of them.” There are a considerable quantity of persons among the black population whom very much dislike me. But, they can call me a racist if they like, because of my pride inherent in being white, and I will take that black and be again known as more of a racist than the real racists. Perhaps you can perceive then what is happening. Hello there to anybody reading who knows La Perouse, thanks for that handshake mate, and will you find out why I became a Muslim before its too late? This Hijab sure itches my head, but I am making progress with persuading the Ummah of Islam to believe in us and our Aboriginality as a plus.
If I had any message for the Aboriginal youth who identify with their parents and grandparents struggle, through what has become of the tent embassy, then the italics in the last paragraph, are sort of what it would be. I could not have expressed it well when I was last there and received only a broken nose and a black eye for trying. But I hadn't put my self in the Hijab picture yet then. I don't, in general, get along so well among black women, except the older ones, which can be understood in the nature of there being diminishing numbers of decent black men around. It is easy to take me wrong in telling that I can no longer stand the idea of the touch of white men.
The few black men whom have taken me up on my offer, never addressed to men, of a stroll through white culture, did within their own intent to sell me out to the whole black community as though I am any old prostitute, . . . and they have gained: a) appreciating themselves being in my company; b) finding their own social value in black society improve through my company, but not when in my company; c) causing that my worth is found suspicious by their hiding of their actual valuation of my company; d) causing that I was myself drawn into the observation of a series of white criminals, whom were seeking to prevent that I could provide this sort of knowledge into the black community. I guess they are white criminals whom are regarding that modern urban mythology is their own private tool for the manipulation of. They are wrong. Even urban mythology is long already won into the Indigenous story traditions and Qur'an.
This pattern I am describing of street level racial relations is a commonly repeating one. Most recently repeated in my life through my eating at the free food hand outs for those without a house to live in on the streets of Brisbane. Actually, in general, I don't mind the company of the blacks on the street, and really, to survive on the streets of cities, in which the city itself seems to be one big criminal mind, is a skill comparable to that of being a hunter gatherer. There is an informal system in urban Aboriginal contexts, by which any person whom gets themselves into trouble in their own community, has to put in time in the lowest local social strata, which is usually among the homeless, and involves work oriented tasks of keeping an eye on what is going on with local street politics among criminals and between criminals and police. Just because I am white, here in Brisbane, if I want any Aboriginal identification, I am expected to be relegated to the station of homelessness.
I have raged against this more frequently than not because the only reason I am in Brisbane is for the conduct of a family court case in which my children were removed from me because my identifying within the Aboriginal community was regarded as insanity. I need to state that the reason my identification is most often not validated, is less because of discrimination against my white skin, and more because of the need in the Aboriginal community to be relieved of the burdens of being assumed to be homeless, in which I am only a social convenience. So I am the housed homeless in repute, but more like the inhousable at home, where my temper has me in a local cleaning strike. I work at sustaining my self within an Aboriginal identity, as any person with one must. Any interactions with blacks that I am enabled in, are those enabled me by Aboriginal Kinship, and I accept only those available with any relatively trustworthy sober black Aborigines, while also sustaining a home, and I live and learn. Yet pointedly, I never related with folk only because they are black. Though there might be many ways of interacting which I now never enable my self while in white company. This is the reality of me, despite having my nose broken at the tent embassy, I can still always trust black people more readily than whites. But why I really don't tell. Usually neither will I tell much about the obvious social oddity of my being overtly a Muslim. The Brisbane Streeties seem to imagine that my hijab is there own personal sweetie wrapper.
My approach is to only communicate with any person within a working reason that is not their social or racial status, but is my need to communicate. Constantly I am finding that there are blocks being put in my road by the mechanisms of organised crime, and that I can, somehow begin to accommodate why. It might be only that a few crooks might profit less from black youth if my writing becomes well read, but now what seems to be in play is a regard that I must be prevented from winning in court, so as to prevent a white family from winning an important landmark stolen generations case. Oh well, the courts are now knowing me as a white Australian Muslim rather than as an Aborigine, and the case has oriented to proving the Jurisprudence of Shari'ah rather than proving a case for reparations for stolen generations. One and the same cause in truth. The difficulty is really not that it might have been better for a black family to be in a winning position, but that the courts regard me as an Aborigine and as representative of other Aboriginal women, as though the black community are supporting no mothers, which is really what necessitated that my identity become known rather as that of a Muslim. A Muslim identification can safeguard the self better than and Indigenous identification, from wrong assumptions about cause and effect.
There is legal evidence that my children will be able to sue the Commonwealth, that is no less real with the Aboriginal community refusing to supply evidence of my being an Aborigine and within that cultural regard. But those whom so try to prevent me, and most of them white racists whom are interfering in the local black Dreamtime experience, because the perceive their advantage in blackfellas not believing me, have imagined that the whole case is a set up that I partcipated in causing, and so I am constantly in a heated battle over this with whomever in the black community will lower their dignity to talk to me. I can here state categorically that I had no hand in causing my court case. Whether or not I can idenfity who did it, is neither relevant to the case, in which a brain dead violent alcoholic Irishman has been awarded interim custody now for three and a half years, and it ain't because of any failure of my own motherhood. But the initial act of removal of my children from me happened on site at the tent embassy, and I have rather extensively protected the black population from this fact by never accusing in respect of, yet I know that the racists are so accusing. I rather place the culpablity at a later date here in Queensland, during Sorry week 2003.
As a white mother whose children are removed my social identity among the black community is far lower than it is among the white community. In general the white community are more likely to believe that I was discriminated against for openly identifying Aboriginality of remote descent as a social identification. While the black community seem to have been imagining that I set my self up to rip them off of a sorry for stolen generations, and certainly struggle to manifest belief that a white person has been discriminated against because of an Aboriginal identification, albeit an informal one. Meanwhile I am raging all day and all night in total ferocious hatred for all the forces which consipired to remove my children from me, but am disabled to effect any real change alone, and have been abandoned to my rage by both black and white mainstream Australian communities. That is, except for those real friends whom are, like me, totally socially disadvantaged in this scenario.
I feel like screaming all day every day, and I know that this rage I am feeling is only that portion which is mine, of the exact same rage which imbues the life of every indigenous person whose land is ever invaded, and whose children are not safe. And I know why there are Aboriginal youths using drugs. The moral support I receive is in the worldwide setting of those whom align to the Ummah of Islam, many are African, and also Indigenous American, with even Chinese Muslims among, and many many Aborigine believers in Christ. In the minds of most people I meet socially here in Australia, if I complain too loud then I am proving the legal case against me, and if I fail to complain I am also proving that case against me; supposedly, and so outside of my writing, inclusive of many legal documents, I am most often very silent about these things.
There is not any real case against me, because I am factually quite sane, and my temper is very evenly held by a lesson long learned. My evidence is being categorically dismissed on the basis that believing in the same stuff as Aborigines and/or Muslims, is a definition of insanity. Perhaps now sooner rather than later, the children's father will be persuaded by his legal representative to give the children back, since he certainly will not like being the face of loosing to the fact of the permanence of the reign of Shari'ah as the more just system of Canonic Law. So unless you are one of the white Australians whom are already among the Indigneous Ummah, like the many I meet regularly without housing, here is the subtropical Brisbane City Parklands; might I commend that I could tell you a few good books to read so that you too might receive that necessary shock without having to face the blood and gore of the past murders of the incarcerated giving evidence to war, or having your own children removed by negative racial discrimination having being overtly attached to belief. Strangely it is that quite a surprising number among Brisbane's homeless have already read Qur'an. Not a majority, but a silently influential minority.
In this position, I would have no basis of reality if I were not, first and foremost, putting my health ahead of every other concern except the wellbeing of my children. There are black youth whom regard that I am in a white only culture because of this fact, that I care for my health, but I know that where I have had the means to learn full initiatory material from within esoteric Islam, which is equitable with a full traditionally oriented Aboriginal education and series of initiations, most urbanised youth just are not being provided to in this basic need. That is the only reason why I could have climbed a social structure ladder among the urban Aboriginal community, if I had only been a regular marijuhana smoker, and even surfaced at the top.
The problem is not that I am white, but that I am white and not inclined to any criminality, so receive no veiled bribes, like many black Australians whom turn away from in favour of True Law. Aboriginal youth need the knowledge I have acquired, and urgently so as to protect the next generation from crime. If only they were being enabled to connect with their fears without resorting to drug use, this country will be made one Ummah in reality once again. One Indigenous Ummah. This is why I am at odds with much of the local Islamic community. Islam could have been providing to our youth. Islam has the means. Rather has the American Indigenous community been provided to first, but at what eventual expense while Native and Afro- American Prayer sustains me? Will our Aboriginal culture become taught more fluidly to the mainstream as The Way has been taught in American tertiary institutions? What is that difference in The Way that our Australian Indigenous worth brings?
I hate to mention it, but as a part of a race whom longest knew the truth of that passage to Jannah, we might in fact be onto a winner by having decided to let ourselves fall out of self certainty. That is to say, letting that the teaching of The Elephants will have its way, was our collective perception at the starting of this invasion. But if only the Jews had evidence in Qur'an, we'd really all be in it together. Allah might not help, but by calling Allah “God”, is the best way to pray for any Muslims whom ever prevented Jews knowledge of Qur'an, for surely that fulfillment of Prophesy is the most terrifying portion of deception for any person to have fallen among, and I have witness to such. Compassion can only be that of guessing that somebody had to be so blind as to. Meanwhile this immense contradiction between our reports of being in the sunshine, not the shade of Allah, and accepting each others pain relief, while knowing its expense is real, is just that we are living through without doing these things, and our witness of Prophesy is real. Real that we each encourage each other in just that acceptance which enables accepting one more small portion of the total account. So any Muslim believers whom know what I am meaning, this is our Dreaming and we need to know your will is with us when we see your falls also.
Where Muslims with the resources to help Australian Aborigines, are providing in Redfern, it is not within the world of Islam as it is compatible with an Animist cultural belief. Aborigines will give up drugs and give up many objects of the invading cultural identity, will readily give up any animal behaviours and animal mind, but will not give up certain belief that when we die we become turned into animals. But in providence to non-Animist beliefs among us, we are reduced in our capacity to adjust to fear. Those with an Aboriginal identity whom are not communicating this to the Ummah of Islam, are not truly Aborigine in biology. One Aboriginal fellow put it to me that he is a Muslim whom does not Pray. It took me a while to figure out that he meant only that he will not perform the supplication aspect of Prayer, becaue his du'a is sound.
That we “always take our animal (or bird)” is what defines us in Spirit. Just another part of nature, the worms will eat us and fertise the soil, the native grasses grow and the Kangaroos eat of, and we will become our own meat, no need for the extremities of fear to hide from, and no need to be a guilty person to know that death is to fear, or to believe that Allah's will includes for us to exist in the natural forms that are different to the Human form.
Aboriginal culture has this fundamental difference to most of the world's cultures, there are not many whom can mentally adjust to living in two cultures, and those whom can usually are not inclusive of Australian Aboriginal belief system, and also are most often also unable to express their experience in the English language, except in American and Muslim examples.
Yet here in Australia is the whole Aboriginal population existing in two cultures and most of us also speaking English. But a fact of failure of provision of inter-cultural teaching materials in English has worked to the detriment of Aboriginal Australian youth whom are taught in English. I intend that my work will combat this fact. Also I know, and know of, Muslims whom believe in my work. But often that I am factually bound through my own eventual death, to the Indigenous Ummah by cause of that Corroboree in 1988, through which I am bound to provide of every resource I can find which will strengthen our Indigenous Ummah, and this makes me an expensive kettle of fish for the international Ummah of Islam to accept, because the Australian way is to be inclusive, while Arabs tend rather to work exclusivity as strength.
So I am learning to tell it like it is in the English language, and most folk just aren't used to that, especially that I can tell you that the five pillars of Islam already underpin everything which founds the beliefs of Traditionally Oriented Aboriginal Australians. So, while we don't all bow to Mecca, but within Shari'ah are exonerated that by travel expenses, and more importantly of old, our inherent capacity to conceptualise distance, and we do pray through the land of our own fathers. How many Australians like me are likely to realise that to land Ka'ba is to land the world? My sons have realised while living at their fathers. Meanwhile in my English trained external mind, I pray in the direction of Mecca frequently without connecting through any local Mosque or Imam, just because I can.
Thanking all the black Australian authors whose work paves the way of putting pen to paper in realistic self-referential English, I reckon that it is about time a few whitefellas had our say, and wore our share of the burden of being who has a life story that is in need of being told as a prickly pear of what nobody wants to know. While the black population is absorbing the incarceration rate which the British brought here, it is the least I can do to absorb the story of a struggle to be heard.
Meanwhile, if there are any blackfellas or whitefellas who reckon they can avoid our collective cultural heritage of accountibility to land, only by becoming a Muslim, well I reckon we can let them try, don't you? They might too, but only if they were not true to being an Aborigine. But then, it all depends upon what you can acknowledge of what the Arabic word “Muslimah” is meaning. And what is that Surah “The Elephants” about, and how can in nurture the case of Justice for Mulrunji? To question who are the real terrorists, is to know why I prefer to be identified with Lebanese kidnappers, than with the Judaic world that nazism has infiltrated, but only until we take those Elephants, in full, straight. To a Jew, if the old testament is a treasury, and Gospel victory, then Qur'an is straight bliss.
So in 1988 I was at a Corroboree, so what? What has that got to do with it, might many ask. It is nothing to ride my crediblity on, and doesn't make me special, but “it has everything to do with it”, I will say. I am bound under the strict obligation I have described, by a whole convoy of people, and the whole tribe of each of them, and the whole collective Ummah, for my passive particpation there that day. I have seen all the signs in the Australian Institue of Aboriginal And Torres Strait Islander Studies in Canberra of the Rom ceremony that was performed at the old site before it co-located with the new National Museum, so am bound in that also to every aspect of Traditional cutlure I have read about within the library there.
I went to the Museum on the day it opened. I made a middle of the day decision to show my children Pharlap's heart, after not being able to make the early morning smoking. We were bare foot and pyjama clad in actual fact, but I had suddenly thought of it as an attendance of important consequence while in the car for some other, forgettable, reason. We sat on there on the grass at the new museum while Aboriginal performances progressed, and I felt that something is wrong, then I suddenly remembered, “Oh, I haven't told the children that we have Aboriginal Ancestry”. So I told them, not as my Nana had informed me, but with pride and dignity, and commitment to work to ensure that my children live up to this inheritance. And with the sounds of the traditional performers songs ringing in our ears.
In 1988, something happened to me which triggered a pattern in my subconscious. In fact, it is a pattern in which I am able to cause that a subconscious awareness is made able to become into the conscious mind. But it is also far simpler, and just the pattern of my own Dreaming from where I am born, and as it connects by my Dreamline, into the Northern Territory. But the immediate trigger that day in 1988, to my external mind, was not recognition of my own song as is the inherent internal experience, but was hearing the woman from my home state of NSW speak. She said: “we can't do it alone, we are only 2%”, and I heard within the very deep and painful sorrow that was being expressed, a permission being granted to participate in this process as a white person. I was informed that I am needed, with more strength than my mother had ever informed me.
Back then I didn't even know I am an Aborigine. Well, I could guess, but it was very soon after the Corroboree that my Nana warned me not to look at the photo or I would grow to resemble that black ancestry. I heard her only in her assertion of inheritance. I will not hear her in her fear. So I privately received a blessing, and set about that year to become a more active part of work against racism. When I was in London the following year and the one after, I put a Land Rights flag on the picket of the South African Embassy in Trafalgar Square and it was there the day Nelson Mandela was released, and now the Ummah of Islam whom are actively working in Southern Africa, are supporting my work in Islam for Australian Aborigines. It won't need to be only 2% of NSW who make this country one whole Ummah of Aboriginal Kinship again.
I was in London at a concert which a member of the Guilford four attended on the night of that release, (The Guilford four were Irish folk framed as thought members of the IRA and whom spend long in prison.), and I have been into the Sein Feinn office in Dublin, and I recently met a Sein Feinn member here in Brisbane whom believed in the more difficult work among my writing. I have been openly informed that my ex-partner has been disconnected from his original ancestry in Ireland by cause of what he has done to me and my children.
I connected with the oppressed and marginalised in the British Isles whom might be able to comprehend what it is to be an Indigenous Australian, because what was Merlin if not an Indigenous Englishman, and a Magi, and who would I be as an Indigenous Australian, who has European ancestry, if I had never connected with the best of the British. “Magi” is that term recognised in many places as describing the genetic difference of being like an Australian Aborigine, and is who the wise men wer whom visited baby Jesus. It took me a bit longer to learn about our shared Muslim ancestry among Europeans, but that is an essential connection in this story, and realistically is why I am alive to tell it.
My own personal ancestry includes the heritage of the spoils of the crusades, inclusive of marriage to Muslim princesses. Saladin's curse is my own to claim blood right to access the beneficience in Allah of. If “It's Time” was ever real for the Whitlam Government, then the idea that it is now or never must sustain currency. The showgirl style election campaign of the “It's Time” victory was one of the most absurd condundrums of the whole situation in which we Australians, with Indigenous memory and Dreamtime, have been marking time for a long long time. That we are on the brink of reaching the hour of judgment, which has always been a component of the Australian Dreamtime in the minds of those whom could never forget a past in which there were veiws of an impossible future, only has sense to the “It's Time” showgirls within the absurd impossiblity of time multiplied by being Australian. We Australians who know that the hour of our eternal judgement is at last arriving, just have to mark the occasion with our very worst, just to prove the point that we are all here in this mess together. Believers and Satans, kafir, migaloo, and uneducated Nomads, it's time for socialism, and time to show off that we all know it can't get any worse. But how can we have let it from the 1970's then? The answer is because Whitlams success was through the worth gained in blaming.
So I was at a Corroboree in 1988, and so what. The work of such things goes on in our collective mind all the time, without the currency needing to be known by everybody whose life is effected. The whole of modern civilization is regulated by that exact same comprehension of the Dreamtime which regulates Aboriginal culture, but of the mainstream western European oriented industrialised money driven societies, the mechanisms are not usually knowable, and are bogged down in the crimes of those whom steal of. The occultists work with many of the same premises as any Aboriginal Corroboree is based in, but who are they when they are at home, and will anybody work with believers to weed them out of the Masonic lodges. The Australian police certainly need to be stripped down of the benefits they received from any occult work against the real tradition of Aboriginal Corroborees. As for where there are any occultists connecting with Islamic teaching, truthfully they orient more and more all the time in the Rosicrucian sort of direction. That direction any of us must know only as well as need be to avoid, and weed out from among whom we know are well, including enough whom are known as Masons of one form or another, and whom are truly waiting for the return of King Solomon.
My life went on regardless of being at a Corroboree. But I was effected. For better and for worse in good times and in health. My socialisation was still oriented to the predominately white group of peers whom I meet in my teens, but soon enough I decided to have children while still young myself, and without a Husband. I made this decision based in a certain fear that I needed something to oriented my wants back into the ground with. My peers and I had all trained our minds in feminism, and so a boyfriend was sort of obligatory if we were to avoid the lesbian cadre who seemed only to feign being socialists.
It was as though I was seeking to undergo an initiation of sorts, the sort which childbirth always is for females. I was factually instinctively seeking the means I needed to cause fear in myself of the consequences of that life I had already lead. Already I was inextribably off track, before 1988, put off track by all sorts of odd and unnecessary interventions of interests other than what any teenage girl should need to have to deal with. Actually I suspect it was the feminists who had put me off track. Somehow I knew that a solution was to make my life difficult by having a baby. Fortunately I knew better than to resort to that other strategy that youth at a loose end often resort to, of taking drugs.
We all need something to remind us of the fact that one day we will die, and that life should be hard work, and when drugs are the only avenue in lives that have been given the false orientation of money, then I guess we must face the fact that crime is governing society. This facing is what is being done by many people of my generation. Why is it all too easy? Go to school, get a job, get money, buy and house and car, have sex, make a baby if that happens to be the case . . . . nah, nobody really buys it, do we? That is not what reality is made of, except for the baby bit, and, ooops if you look a bit further and buy drugs, or buy Religion, then you find that there is death to fear, and so sex is to fear, and so then what are we alright, and why are we even alive?
Does anybody exist who believes that it is all about the house and the car? Well, now that I mention it, these things like Corroborees and Prayers seem to regulate that for many vacuous folk all about the place, the house and the car are life, and at least they aren't at war in that case. But hang on, or are they? Is this seeking a house and a car just as good as the neighbours are, causing overconsumption causing wars? Causing drugs? Now who are the dudes who are selling the drugs and what do they know about this house and car business that we don't know? Well, what do they know? And WHY is this description one of a not so uncommon a processing of the life story of very many Australian youth.
Hang on, why, we have gum trees and kangaroos and stories about you and me as well as about old blackfellas who are almost, but never quite, dead and gone! And look, those blacks aren't even almost or nearly dead and gone, but alive and well and asking to be listened to! And look there is another new book that historian Henry Reynolds wrote telling us all about what will make our life difficult without the drugs. Why not find out about the crime that causes black deaths in custody rather than the crime that causes drug sales? The result is the same wisdom in a healthier body.
I guess that I am saying that I believe my self to be at the front of a generation of Australians whom are just not able to accept that everything which has gone before must amount to us being ordinary run of the mill mainstreamed bunnies. (Even if some black Wirrin casts a magic spell on us and turns us all into rabbits in the end.) The generation in which, by questioning why, when it was all given to us on a platter, we learn that by expressing our difference from each other and our difference from our parents, and our difference from the rest of Humanity, we become more and more alike to the rest. Every generation rebels, but now, we are being force feed methods of rebellion. So far force feed that rebellion becomes no longer running away into star studded rich kids ville, but falling into the gutter in self righteous, self certain, ascetic denial, of that non-reality of consumerism.
We want it real man. And that is what we are getting, but if only we can learn not to believe that we need money. Meanwhile all the so many whom are struggling to know what is real which they can not yet find, are getting nothing at all but more and more indebted to their own truth in Allah, while those whom try to prevent people like me from being and perceiving are causing us by their methods of prevention. There is a hole in the ozone and history is telling us of all of its causes without telling us of a solution which we can earn the right to buy with ready cash.
There are Aborigines who fought for and won some land rights and we can all sing “My Island Home”, in knowledge that the worth in which it is sung to the world at the Sydney Olympics was a very hard won battle. We know that even if we are not feeling at home here on this land, even the racists know that Aborigines are winning something real and that the suffering that accompanies that win is so far into the terror of the modern situation, that even now today, when many of us know about the bloody frontier that Henry Reynolds writes of, The Great Australian Silence has not been displaced. We can just hope for a minute, and to every minute, that the cult of forgetfullness, Henry Reynolds also refers to, is gradually diminishing all the time, and that its eventual finish will be that hallmark of the victory of Indigenous worth in every land mass. Then will black silence be the victor. The silence born of determination not to repeat any story of needless suffering. We are a whole generation that cries. We can hear and see that it is inevitable, but 'please let it be there is a way to lessen this fear of the future for me so that I may walk into it in Allah's Grace'. A generation who can never escape. A generation for whom the tears well dry, and whom find, no more terror from that idea of an hour of Judgment, but truly only relief. Are we not the inevitable pre-requiste?
I have thought about this: that to be published as a writer I could omit the fact of being a believer in Islam, the fact that within the esoteric heart of Islam many Aborigines here in Australia can be rightully regarded as Mujahid(een), if only we spoke Arabic to know what that means. It sure puts the frontier conflict into a different mental category. Who is Robin Hood? Who is Maid Marion? Who is King Richard and Friar Tuck, in the real legacy of the fact that the crusades were ended by Saladin marrying his daughter to King Richard of England, and within that condition, as any Corroboree repeats the best of the Ancestral past, so is it already that historical re-enactment societies repeat crusaders battling with broad swords and chain mail. Who will mind the Spiritual welfare of us whitefellas, in that condition.
The condition in which Terra Nullius, enshrined in the Australian Constitution, is the Invaders breaking of the conditions they themselves set for us. Conditions Prayed about, but regarded by most Arabic speakers as being American rather than Australian conditions; while some Americans try to prove that we are an inept race in Spiritual management for failing to have enforced that our country is Governed by a Treaty and a Bill of Rights, so there for the claim upon Saladin's curse is their right.
There is an oddly not quite right, but heartfelt regard for the Indigenous peoples whom have experienced invasion; and which is causing a strange set of conditions to migrate from America back here into Australia, which are foreign to us, yet not, is that the world of Islam is weighted with Aboriginal Australia, and never could have been any other way. The Indigenous Americans are perhaps only more duplicite than Aborigines are about what to do with strangers, regardless of their Religious orientation.
The keep 'em happy camp is really not what Islam is notorious for falling into, but there you have it, Arabs fall to traditional American strategy, and how many are fallen? Peace and Love man! The felling of Islam the Glorious, Islam of knights and of round tables, Islam of Gothic Cathedrals, (of which there is one here in Brisbane which even has a crescent moon and star marked into the masonry); Islam of the Masonic Temples and Tuetonic knights, and there is that story of Jesus in Islam, only wrong somewhere in falling into a Rosicrucian dream of living only for death. Rosicrucians have no idea of the real Indigenous worth of North America which Islam went there to fund unity in Allah among. We all know that it is the Christian Churches story, rather than the Muslim story, which took that peculiar turn of falifying that Trinity is three blokes with fancy stonecutters hats and silver rings handed out by Hitler, but do we all remember yet that it is Islam underpinning the truth in Jesus?
Only Islam sustains in completion that book learning by which all Aborigines are going to become enabled to pick up the pieces and make the world real again; that is, if you believe Islamic Prophesy, and apply it to your own life rather than as other minds might suppose it is best applied. In fact, that is the best any of us ever manage. Indigenous Americans whom found their own successes in that, are factually no less enabled that I, or anyone, by the worthy might of Islam. Regardless of if any Australian might be more correctly enabling Islamic Prophesy, you just need to remember, of worship in Jesus, that where Qur'an (Koran) says to decry those whom worship Father Son and Holy Ghost as through three individual Gods above God, that we are to sustain belief in One God whom is Allah, without decrying Jesus, whom walked the Earth a man and a Prophet, whose teaching is perfect and sound, and exactly as any good Muslim knows through the Surah (chapter) called Maryam (Mary), about the Prophet Isa (Jesus). As for Iblis (A Jinn whom used to exist in form of Satan), why He is the redeemed because Jesus showed us how to deal with the Satan. But these are things that Aborigines were already aware of, why our mythology is full of stories of the redemption of the fall. We only need to learn how far ahead it is that Americans had taken these stories, after all the Church of the Later Day Saints (Mormons), might no like informing us this, but they do read Qur'an. It helps to know these things while in Kinship with a Warlbiri Baptist Congregation, as has my skin name, “Nungarrayi” been given me by.
So I should tell then only a little about my certain knowledge of the what of how American Indigenous Animist belief is different from ours. It has a difference which serves to protect children. The good and the innocent are regarded in a higher state of being sacrosanct than here in Australia, where everybody takes their own share of all ills. In America, this status has been wrangled from the sinners, by misinforming them that they might get stuck as an animal forever unless they protect the little children from any animal self. The hard part for Indigenous Americans now, is that they realise that children are already willing to accept portion of the ills, and we are all beginning for children to need to be conditioned so as to; but there are old dudes, like Johnny Cash in that song “Hurt”, who want to fight that process only because of time honoured belief that there will be no way out unless some of us never fall down. Whereas here in Australia, we all did it together all along, all diving in together, and so are tempered to associate with shaytan through only getting bodily ill from. Our higher mortality rates are always in the cause of Spiritual awakening and salvation. Poor Johnny Cash, who at least felt safe to tell us his fear, in certainty of his innocence to his fear. It's alright dude because “We're all in this together”. Lets hope that the Australian pop music industry has no further pressure to be paying out to America, and we can again be hearing our own Dreamline tunes in the radio. Essentially if that Ozone hole is going to close, the world world needs to listen to that tune. In that tune lives the hardest of every of the stories this essay tells. It is a blue tune of the Crow, and a women whom helped me prevent being socially identified as a prostitute, not for my sake, but for my children, is who has caused that it is a story to end, and once here told in that context, has no further right to be. Some stories are just too hard to be known in, but more especially when already a mother but never cared for by any Husband.
I could deny being a Muslim to my own benefit, but I won't, not even, these days, for social crediblity among the socialists. Or I could deny my Aboriginality, and perhaps then be more readily supported in becoming a published author by the Ummah of Islam. Even were I a black sister my whole story could carry more crediblity than is carries today while I write in this white skin body. Black Muslims are at least an existing social category, as are black indigenous Australians, and even many black Muslim Aboriginal Australians, like Anthony Mundine. But nobody can quite recall yet how a social construct of a white revert to Aboriginal Australian Animist Islam could ever even have entered our sensiblity of what is possible.
It is a bit of a big hat alright; the embodiment of the general world veiw that can be carried into any employment situation is as an initiator and a big picture thinker, with a kind of para-legal social work skill set. But us whY-generation seem to be who prostitue our self without getting money. It is either that or prostitute our ideals for money, because when you know why, there is no space between, and between a rock and a hard place, when we find we can live without prostituting our selves, we will already be hereafter in Jannah. Is it that we could see a solution to prostitution through prostuting losses? I Pray not, but fear so. Where are the qualified doctors who are also qualified lawyers up the rungs of the social ladders we are falling off, those whom might have been able to validate our worth. The worth of an ordinary Indigneous Australian Muslim is next to nothing when not accepted at the local Mosque; except that as a white skin Indigenous Australian Muslim, Praise Allah that there are Traditionally Oriented communites whom can not but accept me into their reality.
That the scene is set by the fact that it ain't going down well in court where I am wrongly branded schizophrenic for associating with blacks, is the scene of inevitable affiliation between Aboriginal Australia and Arabic oriented Islam. The psychiatric profession seem to be trying to communicate that their hands are bound by the insurance industry preventing them from forensically giving me a clean bill of health, and off the record, why yes, I could just do them the favour of getting out of their office since there are so many other patients more needy, but in a medico-legal report, why there just isn't any industry. And secretly the local member of State Parliament had tried to fob me off to the Federal Attorney General's department in the situation of the total failure of the Australian Nation State and State of Queensland, to provide for me, as every other Government pensioner is provided for, in every responsive legal case, a legal aid grant of aid. The medical reporting I need has a starting cost of $10 000- that legal aid are not yet paying, my family will not, and the Aboriginal legal service refused to contemplate without my certificate of identity, while the Aboriginal health service which provides such certificates, tells me their doctors can not write any material which might be used in court.
And every time I try to turn back and look to method of getting out of any of these socially constructed identities, I find that the way out is the way back in, over and over again. I have been studiously writing letters to any person whom might have the slightest interest in my predicament, now for over three years. And I write, and write and write, and have already wrote a book of some worth once it is made more, more, well, more properly like everybody else's book is I expect. Maybe when I sue the forensic psychiatrist, whom legal aid paid to report on my ex-partner also, but whom just believed his lies, I can fund its being published as I want the full story to be knowable. And there is James Blunt singing in the background reminding us all of war and love and lives gone by uncounted. I have known a few, and know the Hell that will save those I love true, and we all have listened too; But all this, is nothing but my own need to communicate, just one working single mother, just one believer, just one individual whom could be anyone. Why me? Is it only because I am told the hard truths? Swallowed the shock, and knew.
I know that my own story is really worth nothing of material wealth, unless it builds upon the work of authors like Henry Reynolds whom have already built a professional basis of work to set the historical records straight. Without work like that of his authorship, I could not have been told, nor would the audience be enabled to be told by me. My self as I am here at a cross road, after having persued the life of an ascetic since I was a teenager, most often quite without comprehending any Religious reason; I am now in that position of realising fully a need to be valued in the material world. Yet will not become a mother whom works for cash, because I can see only further detriment to my children in that. How many years wages saved to pay to be able to win that my children live with maternal love, has no worth if that love is being used to earn the money to prove that I should not need to. Especially in a country in which legal aid grants are provided to respondents whom are governement pensioners, except it seems, to who nobody wants to believe can be real and sane, while having been told lies about to the extent that what I have perceived is that the whole system of legislative justice for the poor crumples and falls in cases in which child rape is suspected. I am no child rapist, and the courts have no right to suspect such, nor had my children's father a right to tell his lie about what his Irish father did to him, as though it was me to my son. And the forensic psychiatrist had no right to believe him over me only because of the regulations in the insurance industry.
As a writer I seek to report factually. To report facts that will later sustain any historic worth, I report from either other non-fiction writers of credible witness, or from my own experience. There in am I finding that I just keep on returning into an Aboriginal cultural regard for the science of defining what is real and what is not. What is tellable and what is not. What is the true historic record.
Our own story which we remember, each with our own sequences and plot, until we have that under out belt then we are nobody to be reporting upon the history of the world as it effects all persons. Really there are many Muslims whom specialise in the history of historic records. Every word Mohammed spoke in twenty three years is recorded and the records are sustained within a thorough system of constant scientific enquiry. Thereby modern Islam is accessible to those of us who were raised with only a modern western European oriented frame of reference of reality, and also to any Traditionally Oriented Aborigine who could be bothered learning either Arabic or English or any of the many other languages which Qur'an and all Ahadith are put into.
What was it that Mohammed said about a mountain, and it is Uluru? Will we know that answer when Qur'an is evidenced in Indigenous Australian languages, or are we already knowing, and are all our Indigenous languages already experienced the full influence of Arabic translation back when the world of Islam was new and larger than it is today. Regardless of which I plough on directing my writing at small elite audiences in various contexts and with various concerns. I wrote for Aborigines for Muslims and for the others forced into false insanity. I wrote for criminals, poems which string together their wedges of reality, but place such back into the world of Aboriginality and Islam. I wrote affidavits for court.
“They”, who control courts and crime, don't personally like me much but seem to believe in my poetry. It became a criminal commodity for a while aligned with specific strains of marihuana available among specific social sets. And the poems are having portionally that effect I wrote them for, they are fishing a few true believers out of the criminal circuits. Social trade circuits equatable with brain chemistry circuits. Believers who cry, but we thought those who had the poems were true, to my reply, but I wrote them just for you because you were falling to criminal minds.
Believers with horror stories of the continuation of the frontier struggle but within our very homes, in our minds and bedrooms. One close Aboriginal male friend was attacked by an axe-weilding maniac of a white European girlfriend, why? Because she noticed that he was taking his certainty of her eventual death into his own so as to cause that she can not prevent her own death being in full retribution. He is, by enduring equitably to her death within his own, preventing her from trying to escape the inevitable by trying using black magic. Now hang on, how many of the texts which Henry Reynolds refers to are describing that same cause of violence? One black man murders one white man, and sixty blacks are massacred, and is it the same story as one unsupported suicide bomber flying into a building in America, killing a few too many folk whose relations find that they are unable to find out what has become of the ghosts of the dead, and begin to panic about retribution and hell fire and brimstone.
In Islamic teaching the whole regard for Heaven and Hell is somewhat simpler to negotiate, but only in Indigenous comprehension is that simplicity given a basis in reality. That grounded reality of every step we walk and the feeling in our feet, is not book learning, but reality walking.
Let me now re-orient this essay back into the actual story I am telling, of my self as a white Australian reminded of my knowledge to the tune of Henry Reynolds plea in not having been told. The truth in respect of the relationship between what I write and the Animist Religion of Aboriginal Australians, and Islam, Christianity etc, is possibly the bigger field of the discussion that I am trying here to launch for broader coverage, but not that which this essay is meant for to tackle. Where the subject matter converges with that larger field is only really indicative of my own personal involvement in the modern internal Islamic debate about what the realisation of Prophesies is potentially actualising.
Rather here let me only highlight that you don't need to be able to give testimony to Prophesies to be able to engage in academic study of comparative belief systems which are comparative outside of the context of only comparing all others to that which deny any reality in “otherness”. So let me then here add to my observations of the Reynolds book in this respect. Oddly enough I can help the Islamic orientation to my observations, so you can properly regard me as the subject of brainwashing, since my neurones have all definitively been through a wringer.
There is a quote from a colonialist voice whom spoke in opposition to the brutality and violence of the frontier. On page 104 of “Why Weren't We Told”, Reynolds quotes: “Already the evil leaven has begun to work. . . .” Now what is not told is whether the writer of 1867 was well versed in the Gospel of Jesus. The chances are that the original writer had a better Christian education than had Reynolds, because the term 'evil leaven' has a very specific Biblical reference which is associated with the causes of racism. The Bible passages are from shortly before Jesus announced to his disciples that to follow him in life they must follow him in death. He had earlier warned them to beware of the yeast of the saducees and pharisees. There is a danger here to suppose that Jesus was being racially biased in telling to avoid certain bread. Yet this is the nature of the phenomenon of Satan, as a psychological inevitablity of confrontations which define reality, in which our identification with that confrontation defines who we are. In confronting Satan we are forced to confront the fact that to disprove racism we can only manifest aliken to those whom truly enforce negative racial discrimination.
Satan exists were we notice that death might prevent killing, and where we notice that getting a head full of lice from blackfellas prevents racism preventing adequate inter-racial communiction, and where eating one communities yeast might prejudice them against us and us against them. The full teaching is rather that Jesus teaches to avoid trade with persons whom practised black magic. That is the fuller teaching which is available through study of the Prophesies of Mohammed in conjuction with Gospel. Yet was it also a teaching available to that Colonist whom made reference to the “evil leaven” in respect of a racial divide? Now again we need to be careful that the term 'black magic' is not becoming associated with persons of black skin. Rather it has a very specific definition. Sihr is the Arabic.
Sihr is of work that attempts to place a negative consequence into the future of another persons life, and by causing that the positive consequence they have worked towards is being already benefitted from by a third person. It is part of any real Religious teaching, including that of Aboriginal Australia, that every negative consequence must be relegated to the past. Punishments are all only to enforce that we never forget that fact. The opiate of masses and masses of us, at its very best.
All true Religious teachings are designed to orient the mind away from black magic and into a frame of reference in which the future is, at all times, able to be held in positive belief. Sadly it is that within British Canon Law, the legal term Terra Nulluis not only describes a world without Humanity, but implies that black magic is apparently the only means of any persons whom might happen to be existing.
It is harder work that it might seem, to be forging a new social identity, an un-before-realised forumla, of what is an accepted variety of normal adaptation. I am after all only normally adapting to the material conditions in which my ancestry portionally defines me as being a citizen of my Nation, but not a Human in habitant of it, and in another portion defines me as a product of long enduring Jihad, of the Greek is particularly strong, but also German, Jew, and English. Can I normalise my process of adaptation into your mental picture of reality? I am barefoot with a magificently valuable gold charm braclet on my left wrist, and two Land Rights flag anklets.
Yet my hijab is no less adhered to than that of many European aristocrats, some of my ancestors among. Like the British Royal family, in one branch of my own family in my Grandparents generation, with their mother an Ettinger, hats on heads was the order of the day all day. The Queen of England certainly still covers all her hair with veil if going out in public without a public appointment.
I had a Dream once in which the Queen features. It is worth telling. Though I like the valuation Reynolds places upon his Dreams of Aboriginal figures, which, to my mind, are the Quinkin, the Dreams I tell of are different. I was having an unusally vivid Dream of the television programme Absolutely Fabulous, when approaching the punch line, the cleverer character became clearly manifest as the Queen, and I realised my self as a Jennifer Saunders whom was the brunt of the joke! I was equally affronted and bemused.
Then I Dreamed of my brother telling that he had had a Dream of being locked in the Queen's dungeon with an array of spectra at his disposal. Hmmm, I wondered. I place my skill to the test. I have a series of Dreams negotiating the fact of general revelation that the culprit who caused the Queen to accuse me, was connected through my having been punched in the nose at the Aboriginal tent embassy. There is a strange Buddhist Monk connection too, for thanks is that. There being a thread through the punch I received of mulifaceted connections to my brother.
Thereafter I am Dreaming of being a character who is attending a function at Buckingham Palace, but I just can't keep the Queen in belief that I am me. One minute I am my mother, and then next a leader at the tent embassy, and the next a consultant to the tent embassy. Then shortly later I am Dreaming of being one among seven whom control among other things the Olympic rings, and whom are deciding to read Qur'an now and again. What was it again, four were the four winds, and I am the Earth, and there is a nazi theme to the story, and all seven, plus secretly another one, are all Dragons. Oh, and one is that Knight I once met, a Sir William Kirby-Jones, who had startling revelations about what the medical profession can provide. (Thankfully the Dream in which an Australian High Court Judge featured was contextually unaligned.)
Well, actually I am really a Basilisk, the snake mixed with a rooster, but I don't tell anyone since they have taken me for another being among these windy Dragons. The black Olympic Ring's worth. But these are only fleeting moments of many Dreams most of which I am not who is remembering, not vividly at any rate. I only provide the influence of my own luck by birth.
Now whatever you may reckon about my psychology in light of these particular dreamings, this has to be somewhat of a record of the currency of urban mythology, and my Dreams are inclusive also of the Quinkin, and The Jinn, and the Angels of Allah as described in Qur'an. There are those who work to the Shaytan also, and the Sihr they do exists, all among the dreams experienced, but as what I recognise to be not of me, not of the real Dreamtime, and so not for the evolution of Mythos, and that is my advantage in being white, that I am not quite so afraid of this choice. And Iblis, why He is a good friend of mine in the Dreamtime. Me in my good Hijab, except brief moments of the Basilisk's eye veiw. In Allah accounted.
However, let me not commend this path to you, since it hurts the heart to have to find what the Europeans are dreaming, and most whites whom are decent will close their eyes to. Mashallah to my father's ability to provide in of the Sphinx, and Inshallah no more Aborigines will be trying to turn themselves into, as we our animal, is an entirely different kind of Dreaming. The skill of the dreams of the European aristocracy is the field in which we Australians are in Jihad. And it is a skill which has combatant only in Islam. In Islamic prophesy we have the battles of Gog and magog to learn, and in that can win the internal Jihad of good Dreamtime regard.
But who will believe in this as a social identity? I guess perhaps I might become just an ordinary old social justice author. With a twist of course. The crediblity of my story here is certainly entirely built upon the self-referential style of communicating, which is essentially of that the Dreamtime. And yet not once have I spilt that milk of why our sacred is in sacred language. That the sacred has been spilt, will be recovered only through realisation that blaming who spilt it did cause the spill. But that is quite enough of this comparison between my Dreams worth note, and those Henry Reynolds has us knowing.
Before departing this inter-cultural mish mash of dialogue about dreams and the real Dreamtime, I am obligated to share somewhat of my own milk and honey of belief. There are rules. The skill to which I have refered is not that of a dreamer. It is the skill at discerning what in every aspect of any dream, is verifyable in the reality of what each our daily experience is; and then, learning how to value each of those real pieces of the images of life. Foremost in importance is the knowledge that to work in any Dreamtime culture we must recognise the psychological function of “imagination” is not real. If being realised, is only so as to realise a heavier account in Allah, and unnecessarily so. We might notice any image internally in our mind, but need a scientific explaination of such so as not to just discard it as not of the real, or realiable world. Consider this significant fact. American popular culture is full of efforts to live true to dreams and affirmations, while Australians will regard any Dream which is experience external to a scientific cultural explaination which can be proven, as not of any worth but in illness.
In valuing each other and our own self, while considering Dreams, we must accept that portions of are the awareness of the inevitablity of death, while other portions are teaching us. Perhaps the many Dreams of Indigenous youth among criminals are because we are needing reminding of the worst we can become? What we are not enabled to realise of what we Dream, will in the end be causal to the deterioration of our physical living capacity. Either you will suffer to, or live through, every minute detail of every thing you ever Dream. So clearly the skill is in discerning, what am I Dreaming of real consequence, what is that which I will die for, and what live to? Yet how many of us can access any control of such whatsoever.
There is a process in Islam translated as “supplication”, which might help any interested readers to follow up on. Its companion Prayer is a Du'a. We Aborigines tend to be more inclined in the Du'a form and really rarely engage in supplications. While supplication can be a form of Prayer made incompatible with Aboriginality by lack of knowledge, it is also a more thorough concept of working to the most efficiently rationalised uses of Dreams and the other results of Prayer. Aborigines teach it best, but because we also teach it within the rule to: “Go with the Dream that wakes you up.” Let that Dream's internal meanings guide your own interpretations of the day to follow, then perhaps be aware of why Muslims aid that process by prayer. The meaning might not be clear, but even to wonder upon it has a healthy consequence. Supplication relieves you of any obligation to follow the Dreams which are in that unhealthy direction in time, but so does Aboriginality by a different mechanism, a supplication to your own self, if you like.
To aid your own concept of Prayer there is a rule: Never consider and never identify; except in consideration of a Man whom has proven himself to you as a trustworthy and adept teacher in your own life.
Be very considerate as to the minds of all other persons, is the real lesson of the Aboriginal Dreamtime. Yet also that you are barely able exert any control over your own mind, little own the minds of others. Think of it like this: If we believe a person has done wrong; then we manifest that belief also in their own mind by any efforts of their consideration or our identification; but if we believe in reality, we believe that eventually we all pay our own way at our own rate, thereby, what you notice of anyother person's errors, you might be best off regarding as only uncertainty, because you are not right yourself if you identify with that person in belief that they know they did wrong. So maybe its time to give the bad guys a break, and really they take all the breaks regardless of your sake, most of enough at any rate. But can you here learn to know that only the bad regard others as bad. Only a criminal will seek to find criminality to blame.
In considering other persons minds, also consider that the Major Histo-Compatiblity Complex cells, which are empirical evidence of Kinship. Proving that Kinship is real. I will not here describe the science, but that it exists in the field of immuno-genetics, yet let me describe the psychology. While I Dream actively in words; others may in pictures or postures of movement. The mitochondrial DNA identifies the mode in which we are intellectually able to manipulate what is in our mind in Dreams. A persons skin in Kinship is named after a psychological capacity. We might all see pictures and find words expressed and move and stand around, but have only one part of all that in which we can actively manipulate our own self, and children might only rarely practise even that small amount of Dream manipulation, because their mother can override a child's wants even and especially in Dreams. A child's mind can really only chose whether or not to believe their father. But the only way any of us may exert control over what triggers our mind is to intervene with our voluntary muscle control of posture. That is, if your Dreams are like a video game, and you have a control stick that only operates one of your control functions, which if you are a child has an override function, then there is one other limiting condition, that of your behaviour. You Dream from among the range of your own experience. That is, unless you are ripping of children by buying an override switch on your controls to take the control of a child's controls away from their mother; or, unless you receive of better than you own behaviour through the supplications of other persons prayers, and the Du'a in your prayers, which is effective only ever until you prove your ability to work to that pattern, or not.
Critically what you embody in your daily life, of all that exists in your unique Dreamtime, is that aspect you are engaged in proving repeating of. The subconscious makes associations of cause and effect by which we actively interpret our reality, then in small parts we are caused to behaviourally respond. Perhaps we do not recognise any connection to the Dreamtime. To be in the Dreamtime one must be accepting full responsibility for every fact of your own Dreaming. Dream it, then if it awakens you, wake in it. Know of, yourself within it. Responsibility for fact is responsibility for where any when every portion of every Dream which your mind contributed to of in active belief. Enact any posture which is manifesting a Dream into daily life, or refuting that it should enter your reality, but rather be a dream of the world only of death, and then your repeating existence in that pose, in moment after moment, is causal to further Dreaming. No Dreams occur that nobody enacted.
But beware of this, since small parts of the images of Dreams might have been belonging in different places, and that is the key to why reason is not what we aim for, but rather feeling how. Eventually we will pass through all the moments and places and all the invasions of minds and bodies and places will resolve into reality Dreaming again. A Corroboree is essentially a corroboration of all our participating Dreamtime minds. What is your frame of reference and what is mine?
Most of all what is that Dream, which this morning, awoke you from sleep? Notice it, then notice the sunshine, and know it your own mind “I am one with my self in this.” As difficult as it might be that it is, but it is. Normally the action is of the past for females and the reception of the future, and for males the reception of the past and the activity into the future. What we receive of is what others regard of us, both true and false. But what we might in Dreams actual seem to be, is always associated only with our own behaviour, and that of every sexual partner, and theirs and so on and so forth. In this, remember not all are in such good health as to know what our minds might manifest, but that if we blame them who are wrong in the Dreamtime, that condition worsens for them, and thus for us mob also.
Think through this again: if we believe a person has done wrong; then we manifest in their own mind as reinforcement of only being a wrongdoer; but if we believe in reality, we believe that eventually we all pay our own way at our own rate. What we can manifest is belief in a positive outcome for all people, even when it might not be that immediately happy feeling they seek. The Dream that wakes you up, for many folk, is the one which reminds them that death will be. Positively, we can only condition our minds into accepting the cycles of nature and the atoms and molecules and cells of our physical body being facts of.
Here is the most important key to sustaining Islam: “Inshallah” meaning only God willing. I Dreamed this that Insha Allah I might live it. Meaning that only when every force in nature united is compliant with that Dream as the course of action suited to the best providence for real life. If I Dreamed it inshallah and then was thwarted in enacting it, whom ever thwarted me has an account owing me, but do not charge them that since the thwarters of Dreams are who thrive off being blamed for their deeds. As our subconscious is inexplicable, and must remain so until the world is re-aligned with the cycles of nature, so is the full effect of behaviour upon our subconscious, but that causal to not being able to interpret the subconscious. So the best we can manifest is to notice how our behaviour, and that our those who communicate with us as their reference, is effecting many person’s Dreaming. That is what functions like running a newspaper are all about. As the subconscious is really the higher conscious mind, but sub in disease only, what we can manage to land of our individual Dreamtime, is really only our own share of the bill for what all of us have robbed from the Earth. Earth that is, who is holding our Dreamtime true, by our very blood being red with iron oxides magnetised to.
Insha Allah, your blood might become magnetised to believing in the substance of Dreams and Prayer.
Among elders of remote Aboriginal communites, in which Christianity is already, (mostly), quite assimilated into Aboriginal Religion's Animist Tradition, whether in open or silent practise, the 'evil leaven' is quite well able to be known as the specific black magic which is causal to an apocalypse. But a causal factor, and not the ultimate cause, since that must be of positive consequence. This understanding also has significance to the fact that among Aborigines in the past, and also today, there are choices made to intermarry with the white community so as to instill the ancient law of inherited reciprocal obligation. That is, Religious Law adhered to by all three Abrahamic religions also.
I wonder how many white skin Australians, like my self, and perhaps Henry Reynolds also, perhaps, are inheritors of that obligation. This is an obligation which seriously indents the action of that 'black magic' or rather should we define 'sihr' simply 'depravity of mental intention', which was causal to the extreme violence of the frontier, and manifests to this day in prisons, on the street, and inside of houses. Within this obligation Reconciliation must be an absolute commitment. In reconciling accounts, I wonder about how our own individual comprehension, of phrases like “evil leaven”, will impact the whole account. As a Muslim I might account the quote differently to that way Reynolds quotes only because I perceive reference to prophesy, which is a comprehension of inevitable, or confession of inablity to have prevented; that is to say, or I might not be any different in account.
Often the account of belief in Prophesy is miscomprehended as a fatalistic acceptance of atrocity as inevitable. In fact, the teaching of Prophets was always simultaneously a description of the worst known that we all might need to endure, and the method by which to practise self discipline, so as to not be causal to the occurance of. So if I can relate that an association with “evil leaven” is an association with the preconditions of an apocalypse, and at the same time, I am agreeing with Reynolds that the conditions being experienced by Aboriginal Australians on the frontiers, then in History, and now in many persons minds, are as devastating as an apocalypse; then I am obligated to provide certainty in how to bear witness without being culpable. That is, I can tell that these things were bound to happen, because of capitalism not being curbed, but that we each have a daily choice not to be whom is fallen to taking advantage of. Once upon a time these things were not inevitable, but came to be so.
One opinon about why is because of what caused anger in Jesus when he threw the money lenders out of the Synagogue. Worse Prophesies became as the depiction of the solution because of those whom kept on lending for profit, and those worse prophesies were accompanied with the instruction to give in Alms of any excess rather than to profit by leanding. So you see, Religion is no more fatalistic than Marxism. Both Marxism and Religion provide the information necessary for the solution, within a comprehension that we can not in minority prevent the social conditions we are witnessing, but must work to try.
Essentially there is no Religion which could have caused me to be a believer, if it was not also supporting a Marxist analysis. Working for a better future is what we are all Humanly engaged in, regardless of whether it is Religious zeal, or Marxist zeal, or belief in ancestral inheritance, which motivates us to work. Believers are by definition, not whom ascribe to any specific belief, but whom work within the knowledge they can not avoid believing in,
Here is another example from Reynolds research which he quotes on page 114 of Why Weren't We Told. “They say things like 'it is well to draw a veil over the dark side of the picture' or 'there one would willingly draw a veil over the sad picture'. Now what attracted me to these quotes is two things. First is that in the second quote 'there' is used within implication that other-where, one might not want a veil drawn. Therefore I can take the quote as equally anti-Islamic to being anti-black, or anti-Aboriginal.
Clearly what springs to my mind by the language in use is the Religious phenomenon of Hijab, commonly translated to English as Veil. Actually it is a Judaic and Christian phenomenon as well as Muslim. The veiling of the vanity that is what appears to please. That is, the concealing of the true appearance of positive consequence. The covering over of reality so that reality is not subject to Sihr.
Obviously Aborigines were not clothed like Europeans, so how can the term 'veil' have application. The reality of the full Arabic meaning of Hijab, and many Christian concepts of 'to veil' as a metaphor, is that the term embodies a definition of a mental state as well as an external behavioural expression. So 'to veil' the mind is to prevent oneself from imagining what one's appearance might, or might not, be. It is that mental state in which a person 'lies low', is less active, and therefore more difficult to track down.
In general there is regarded that the battle front between Islam and those whom claim a Christian identity, but whom Muslims regard as non-believers, (unlike other Christians whom might more likely be Orthodox), is operational in respect of what we appear as at all times. Whether or not we appear in another person's Dreams, is the reality of whether we are adhereing to being veiled. That is the understanding from any Religion. Yet also who we might choose to appear alike to, is of our own Jihad. Or whether we appear at all, and when we have our actual hair covered, then we are better enabled to prevent other persons appearing alike to our own physical appearance. In asking any Muslim to remove the veil, for a medical examination, for example, it must be anticipated that the internal hijab will be in need of support to stay intact.
Consider that the quotes Reynolds took those statements from, might in fact have been made by superstitious folk whom were afraid of the black community being silent, or afraid of the black community invisibly active in the Dreams of white people. Reality is that the intention of the black community has always been to do just that. In fact, when women were sold to white men, it was to cause a genetic manifestation of the possibility to work upon the Dreams of the invaders. Veil or no veil, hijab is sacrosanct, even when its milk spills.
So then who among us descendents of intermarriages between invaded and invader, is able to stand up and be counted again alongside the black skin people whom have borne the brunt of the violence of invasion. Stand up as an indigenous person committed to stabilising the society of the invaders back into believing in being a land based economy, rather than a fiscal profit driven economy? In my mind Henry Reynolds counts as one, even if he knows it not of his ancestry. Most such marriages were accepted in Traditional Aboriginal Law, but not recorded whitefella way.
Reynolds is still not in that generation in which I have grown up, of knowing up front, of having been told, and of having had all illusions of the worth of the nation of Australia ripped from us in our youth. Yet his work was necessary that I could grow up knowing, I encountered in during the Bicentenary, when I was nineteen. I hope that this workalso can inform that process of inheriting the enormity of both positive traditions from many places, and terrible acts on many parts, which are all part of what makes us who we are today; because the processes of learning to hear when we are told, are essential to our capacity to withstand what we hear. For me, knowing is knowing so far into the stories of this land, that we can not silence our certainty of belonging to the black race and so belonging to this land.
Just yesterday I was waiting for the public phone near my house to become available and another red head girl was there also. We talked. She said something racist, about blacks being propagators of violence. I disputed her and established a point that what is being done to black men in prisons is so extreme that they are often forced into a delusional state of mind thereafter, and that is why they are hitting women. Then she revealed that she, like I also, have had our children removed only by cause of associations with the black community. But that the black community will not include us under the banner of being effected by stolen generations, yet still will regard us as of Aboriginal ancestry and therefore within their culture and obliged to their culture. It was sort of fortunate that the woman was a red head like me, because I could cause her to relate to the black skin experience by remembering the difference which red heads experience.
The reality is these days that many blacks whom have themselves fallen for racist arguments of the premacy of black skin, are regarding red heads as that necessarily, lower than they are, step in the social structure, from which to get a step up in the social conditions of racism. But not just red heads so much as any body whom can be identified as being of Aboriginal descent as a white skin person. Well, that is not such a bad position for them to take in order to get that step up which is still long needed even today. In fact the reason we intermarried was to enable that exact thing to happen, that we whitefella Aborigines provide a shield from black magic for the black community. But this is where the whole picture potentially becomes quite terrifying for all of us. What happens when there is sihr projected from the black community onto the only whites whom will help blacks? We did not intermarry only to be persecuted for becoming white. What about my children? Why am I socially trashed for telling that my children were removed because I identified remote Aboriginal Ancestry, but trashed in the black community more so than in the white? I am a person whom offered to help build that step up in the white social structures for Aborigines, but I did not offer that it be at the expense of my children. And like the other red head, though I had the sense not to tolerate such behaviour, it has been inimated to me that since I am white I am obligated to let a black man hit me. I never have let a black man hit me, and used all my social worth in any way to prevent, but I have been bashed on three occassions by black women who only had the gripe that I am white of skin, but blacker of mind than they, and was not giving in to their wanton corruption. There was no frontier in my mind in which that could have been a reality until that day, but now that bloody frontier of Reynolds writing is a frontier in which I struggle to know who the enemy is. No black woman can tell me that I am wrong in my work to protect my children from black men displaying drunken disrespect for their mother.
I have also been victimised by mainly white organised crime groups whom are renowned for the know how of enforcing multiple personality disorders. Their attacks were less violent, more subtle, and more insideously harmful. Thankfully they are not really very good at knowing who their techniques just can not work upon. But the worst truth is that among those groups of criminals, it has been the work by black skin folk, on the almost bottom rung, in enforcing to my self the ritualised abuse which accords that, in general, their bosses regard me as being controllable by them. Thank Heaven that in my own case I have found that every Aboriginal man whom got so close as to be able to try the known abuse techniques on me, was also in fact very loving, sought to obtain my permission first, and was complicit in feigning with me the success of the technique where my permission was not granted.
But here I need to be very careful as to revealing what we were together complicit in. My self and, by now five, Aboriginal men, whom crime gangs have sent to bother me, have complied only in pretending that we are both willingly criminal, and only by cause of knowing that if not, it is likely that a white rapist could be sent to hurt me seriously. Why? Is just because I happen to have grown up knowing. Knowing that as white Australians we are complicit with violence against blacks. Knowing that as a white Australian of Indigenous ancestry I will be a voice who speaks out in defence of black skin persons. Because I have been told I am being socially relegated into categories of deviance. But not just because I was told, but because I listened and knew that the plight out Aborigines is real. Thankfully so did that white rapist, the second among two who set out on my trail to hurt me, actually believe me when I deciphered the Surah The Elephants of Qur'an for him to fear me by.
Why me? My life story. Why is it me, whom as a white skin girl, has had Dreams of being a half-caste Aboriginal child whom was abused so far as to never speak a word all her life. Why am I Dreaming that? Why am I Dreaming of being a half caste Aborigine whom as a mother was forced into prostitution and had my children stolen? Why aren't I like any other apparently 'normal' white Australian. Even being like an ordinary white Australian hippie single mother would have me been better placed than I am today. And I get a feeling like my whole life is a repeat.
A repeat of what to who and when, and can I work this life I am leading into a more positive result that what I fear has happened before. That this is a time in which this is happening to who I am, as a well educated mainstreamed white Australian whom has been provided with every possible educational resource within which to know, that according to Australian legislative justice they can not sustain taking my children away, is that this time the story has to change, or prove that the whole of the system of Justice of legislature is corrupt also for those whom it seems to best serve. This time I will have to change that story of children being stolen, because I must, because there is no future for life unless we end the stealing of our children.
Killing times are better than raping times. I believe that children are hurt less by war than by removal from a loving mother. I have been provided also the education within which to know that there are criminal, corrupt policing, and corrupt government, forces, whom are evidenced to be working alongside so-called Christian Churches (among criminals it is known that the Salvation Army are the only major Australian Charity who do not knowingly harbour child rapists), and whom are the inheritors of the ideology that sustained the removal of Aboriginal children, not because of real difference of skin colour, but because of the process of land invasion, as Reynolds describes the causes of the violence. Why then are those inheritors of that legacy still today fighting. Have they already not won the land, and have found that they have enough of it and were tried in court and found guilty of need to return some of it? But still they continue their frontier violence.
There are families in whom the men are bashed and raped in prison to such extremes that they fear not hitting their wives, and thereby their children are removed. That pattern is factually systematic and the system is knowable in evidence only among criminals, and those same criminals have threatened me that if I make statements to police, they will make a collective set of counter statements which accord false evidence of insanity in me, so as that my children will not be returned to me. Why? What is their interest in the removal of my children from me? Is it truly that they wish to prevent me imparting to my children the serious relevance of inherited reciprocal obligation?
What else do mothers provide children with which they might want to prevent? Mothers provide children with the locks of what is inculturated into a child's mind as to how to discern reality. I have sought out the evidence of why my children were taken, among those whom watched me to prevent me winning the court battle in its early phase. Among those whom followed me and had tried to rape me to prevent my self decency so as to prevent that my children be returned. I have learned that there are criminals whom organise with police protection into persecuting Aborigines also for the reason of trying to prevent the assertion of Aboriginal culture in the Australian mainstream.
The causes of their want in that is tied up in Religious interpretations. They are persons whom expect that if one group of people are obtaining any sort of Religious, or esoteric, or Urban mythology, type victory, that that victory can be prevented if only a different set of persons assume the stories of whom is living the experience of re-creating the stories by which the Human Mythos is eternally maintained. That is, in any life cycle, many sets of persons will live through a set of events resembling by sequence the events of Qur'an, and of any Indigenous story cycle. The songs of a Rom are sung so as that we identify with our own character, in patterns which have known and knowable successful outcomes. These cycles repeat over approximately one life span, but also in 100 year cycles and 1000 year cycles. Now we are entering into a 1000 year drought so the scientists inform us, which is evidence that the period in which a change to the locks upon the stories might have been altered for the better, (for example locking us all into the Muslim economy) is coming to a close. There is a climate of belief among criminals that if only they prevent certain things from happening, they can prevent that any Animist Religion can be knowable as compatible with Islam. Bottom line, that is what is motivating those whom are empowered to prevent that a bloody frontier continues. That the expense of learning this simple fact has been that I am a person whom had every reason to expect that I will be proven correct in the family court, but was repeatedly prevented from, and so sought evidence as to why I was prevented, (a white neo-nazi began to follow me one week before an important court appearance and raped me so that I was entirely disoriented when I needed to be in court; but that was only the most overt of the efforts of criminals in my case, and I believe that many woman, black and white, whose children are taken from them, are similarly being persecuted by the criminals whom control brothels and whom sell that they have caught out mothers who can be blamed for raping children, while they pimp child prostitutes), and found at the bottom of it all, are an assorted group of individuals whom weild social power, and whom believe that it is in their interests to prevent social belief in the combination of Australian Animist and Islam, since then they might been caught out in crime. I'll tell you what, my interest in Islam was only academic until I was raped, but after I was raped, I decided to overtly express my self as a Muslim.
My situation seems too hair-raising to have real credence in the Australian mainstream. But what I am trying here to communicate is that I am not the only person in this “Y”-generation who was told and who just could not buy into the corruption. But we are an ill defined bunch, us of the first wave of this awakening to the reality of what our forebears were deceived of. My peers include folk like: a self identified post modern punk in his fourties doing a PhD thesis; a couple of law graduate school teachers who went out bush to run a two teacher school to give their own four children a decent chance; a Maori women who I met while she was sleeping on the streets, and whom was forced into prostitution, and then forced to have a baby, which was forcibly removed from her, to cause her muscles to orgasm tighter by the fear for her child, and whom is thereby regularly sold by those whom control her life to men whom want to be made to seem innocent of child rape, and whom has helped me more than most, only by believing in me, and in the fact of my children's need of me; a black man who has had a small cut made in the urethra of his penis while he was drunk, by a gay man whom believed that such a form of sado-masichism is the truth of what a Traditionally Oriented Aboriginal intiation is the cause of; a bunch of folk generally regarded as ratbag hippy ferals whom stave off poverty by selling marijhuana to those other folk whom want to know, but whom them themselves become caught by the delusions which criminals want us to swallow; an Australian soldier whom returned from the middle east with a morphine addiction, and whom had been emprisoned and tortured by the US army after he refused an order that he must shoot through a baby in the arms of its father so as to kill the father by killing the baby; and the list goes on and on through the experiences of the marginalised but informed members of this society. In this predicament, how can I not speak out on behalf of these other true believers whom I am describing. Can you think of this with me: I am told that my children are removed because I expressed ideas not socially acceptible; I am told that if I refute my experience and tell that all I believe in is wrong, and take medication which I have no need of, that they might consider returning my children; I believe that my children need to know that my belief is soundly based in real living experience so that they may be able to grow up safer from such social conditions themselves.
There is still that sad part about those whom I am a peer with, that too many have been dependent upon criminality, in that too many were drug addicted. Too many whom have not yet received of the esoteric knowledge I have fallen to, but were seeking exactly that when they took drugs, and bought drugs from criminals who seemed to know esoteric Religious truths. This has been happening to many of us. I fell so, but not to illegal drugs except rarely and certainly not such that my children could be removed on that basis, but in accepting homeopathic medicines being poorly prescribed by a person whom hide his belief in crime with knowledge from within the center of esoteric Islam. A person about whom I learned more than I had known once after my children were removed and I was surrounded by only criminals whom seemed so strangely alike to him. In fact I began to dissociate my self from most of my peers in 1999 for the sake of my children. But then it was that there began a systematic abuse of my psychology. As I withdrew from exposure to other persons behavioural abuse, a whole system of psychological abuse ticked into place and I started having nightmares of being responsible for all sort of horrors that I had no experience of an had never thought about ever. I had been unconsciously prepared by criminals to prevent me from speaking out if I found them out.
Their strategy is that known among Muslims as that of Gog at magog, in which we are prevented from reconciling with one another. Each of our patterned responses has a patterned reconciling reply, which can be forced to trigger an opposing response also. That is why there are high rates of drug abuse and domestic violence among Aborigines. Usually, in this modern time, it is such behaviours which are the cause for children being removed, and given away into the foster care of non-believers. But in my case, they had to work harder and caused a string of misinformation surrounding my mental health status so as to make it look as though my children were exposed to crimes that they have never been exposed to. By the time my children's violent alcoholic father had refused to sent them back to me from a holiday with him, I had make a series of sweeping lifestyle changes over a three year period since separating from him. I had proven my self a good cook by doing the family Christmas all alone one year. I had worked at Tai Chi and lost much weight, and am now a skinny person. I had worked for and been granted permission from the ACT Department of Education to home-school my children in conjunction with their continuing enrolment at the local primary school. I had begun some personal research into Aboriginal Kinship systems aligned with the experiences of my youth and later anthropology study, and in that was working to provide into my children's home-schooling an Aboriginal cultural component. There weren't dirty dishes around the house any more. I had told my ex-boyfriend, the children's father, not to come back from the drunken sordid episodes he habitually displayed, and then had become able to begin to scientifically research a set of ideas which I had been exposed to through interest in alternative health care practises, and began to learn that what I was orienting to as worth valid scientific investigation was Islam. No wonder the bad-guys don't like me. I was simply just living proof without even knowing it, that Islam and Aboriginal Australian Animism reconcile well.
Eventually I even uncovered evidence as to the cause of the sacking of the Whitlam Government within criminal social contexts. Should I just tell it, perhaps not since the stuff of life is not so permitting, and the reason is nothing that the best of us had not already suspected. One of the girlfriends of one of the criminals who did the dealing, while knowing it was to bring down the government, is who told me, and she herself had no caution about whom knew what to what effect. But why then is it not she under police surveillance while I am? Not to mention the fact that when I witnessed who is selling drugs to those whom sell through connections with the Aboriginal tent embassy in Canberra, I only told whom needed to know so as to prevent any more Aboriginal youths from going there to their detriment. That I noticed that there are black Aboriginal Australians whom are quite mixed up with the corruption and the fact that I would not let them blame me for having white skin, has had me branded as an out and out racist pig-dog. Although that branding has been really very convenient since it enabled me to obtain a large degree of evidence from within organised crime which I might not otherwise have been privy to, and then feed that information back into the Traditionally Oriented Aboriginal community. Most of the evidence I have just sort of fell into my lap, and I have not actively pursued evidence until after my children were removed. Those whom benefit still today from stolen generations undid themselves by taking my children, because now I know, and I am who will tell. However, I still need to tell it like it is: “NOT WITHOUT MY CHILDREN”. No success is worth the sacrifice of any children.
Is that not always why wars happen? Those whose only means is crime invade social structures, and then land, and then when they invade our families and minds we decide that war is preferable. Do not then condemn those in the middle east whom fight, because their children are not so exposed as ours. Their widowed mothers need not fear being set up to seem unable to care for their children, and then exposed to rapists whom will force them, by anal rape if necessary, into seeming as though mothers are guilty of child rape, but only so that the rapists can sell children in brothels and pornography on the internet. I have been followed by a man promoting himself as a salesman of child pornography whom is a bit thick and is used by Brisbane police to tempt new customers, but whom the police protect in his own photography of children. The police had me marked as a potential culprit of such crimes because of a family court case, but the man who followed me had me marked as a potential victim. These events were all the prelude of general harassment from neighbours, to being raped by another neighbour, in which I narrowly escaped extreme violence and only because there is a Mosque in the same street as his.
I will not tolerate this nation state, which claims ownership of the land we are born from, being caught red-handed in corruption at the expense of my children, while everybody else sits back in triumph, ignoring their own complicit condoning of Government, without helping me save my children. Yet neither will I tolerate being complicit with pretence about when legislative justice is working effectively and when it is not. How many more black mothers are there whom will have been silent in their evidence so as to protect children than there are us white mothers? How many of us whitefellas were the produce of those half-caste women whom “passed as white” after Federation only so that the children could be raised within the world of knowable maternal love? Yet here now today, is it not the case that I can not get my children back UNLESS I speak up and am believed? While I am threatened constantly in both black community and white, that I need to be silent or can only cause further harm to my cause.
If the facts I relate are real AND my children can be returned safely, why then all our sacrifices have been worth the Earth.
Well, I guess that in general there remains only to be said that I certainly am ever accepting of the fact that most black skin person's lives have been far harder to live than mine. That is the very fact which drives this essay, is it not? Or is it the fact that the Indigenous mentality of people belonging to Earth, is needing a white skin, as well as a black skin, expression, in modern Australia. In my mind learning that second fact is dependant upon believing the first. Perhaps that is simply because we whitefellas would be seriously wrong to leave the whole mess of responsibility for what has become of this land to blackfellas. To leave the entirety of the work of Reconciliation to blackfellas is equally wrong. But also to put up with being assumed to be a racist only because of having white skin is also wrong.
Let me outline here what I have witnessed in this respect. Once I was a panel member of a committee deciding upon allocation of Government funding for Community Housing. Unfortunately the housing body whom I was a member of had an application under consideration and so I was disallowed from contribution to any of the decision making. The senior public servant involved discriminated in favour of an Aboriginal housing group, but it was not a positive discrimination. She decided upon the basis of fear of being labelled as a racist if that group did not get the funding. She spoke that the Department would not want to be named in any media as having discriminated against an Aboriginal housing group, and therefore it was necessary to give them the funding. She had been verbally threatened by telephone with such media attention.
But the situation was that the whole committee, of which I was the only community representative, had been working very hard towards developing a model of funding provision in which funds were only provided to whom could substantiate that the infrastructure was already in place within which to manage the funding. Additionally there is another organisation funded cyclically to provide that infrastructure so that no group ought to miss out by being underinformed. Now I guess that perhaps the Aboriginal organisation could have argued that the infrastructure providing organisation was not letting them equitably access the resources necessary, but that organisation had sustained a record of excellence in qualifications of employees work history of working with black skin people. The decision was made to provide a grant of enough money to purchase a few houses.
Then within the next round of funding the grant was removed because the Aboriginal organisation had not managed the money transparently and within the legislation. So the Government was called racists after all. But with the additional leg of racism in which an Aboriginal group were given a negative experience of managing Government money. I know first hand what quality of experience that is, because as a youth I participated in a young women's group whom successfully applied for and managed a youth grant with which we published an anthology of youth writing. The positive quality of that experience can not be underestimated.
Clearly I am no stranger to the advantage of being white. But somehow I am finding that it is an advantage which is only sustainable as a personal benefit, either in actual ignorance, or within a real racist mentality. Now my father's voice comes to mind from the future in which he has met the hour of Judgment as a believing Muslim, and he simply reminds me that my "somehow" is REPEATINGLY how. I am trapped into repetitions of learning the advantage of white skin, and then giving up, and giving away that advantage to persons generally disadvantaged in social institutions by cause of being black. Yet what advantage in being white is left me, now I am denied legal aid wrongly, and denied use of the Aboriginal legal service.
Now that I am informed of the interests which are causing modern day stolen generations, I am finding that a bizzare series of administrative errors have been delaying the progress of my family court case. But who would I be to associate such administrative errors with court house security, or even believe the letter I have from a solicitor describing that it is not uncommon for the family court registry to loose documents as occurred in my case. If I made those mental associations externally, why then everybody would regard me as completely balmy, and the children's father's case, that I am a paranoid schizophrenic, would be proven. Despite the mass of evidence to the contrary. There are now three independent psychologists whom tell me that it is preposterous to believe that I have schizophrenia, and that I have a case to take to the anti-discrimination commission. While there are a few psychiatrists whom have told me that belief in Aboriginal culture is tantamount to schizophrenia. (Are they relying upon Terra Nullius or something?) But in the full picture the tag of schizophrenia has no legal jurisdiction over me because I have never been diagnosed with a schizo-freno-form disorder for any continuous six month period. The legal advice I have is that I need to pay for a $10000 medico-legal report before even considering any further legal action or I might harm my case. I begin to see the picture of what is being done against black Aborigines.
The picture of police getting away with murder and not calling it war. The picture of Australian soldiers white and black, having been pressured by the British and Americans, into proving the hard way that we already know how war prevents black magic. This is the truth of the Australian legacy. Our ancient indigenous warfare was so well managed in social justice that it would not be recognised in the modern context as more that a back yard barbeque brawl. Is the legal system really trying to regard all belief in Aboriginal culture as schizophrenia, and so arbitrarily dismissing evidence as has been done in the case against me? Actually I have a mild post traumatic stress disorder that becomes active when in association with certain persons, but which is effective at providing me with appropriate fear levels for watching my back among criminals. It was caused only by two accidents. One my own fault at three years old in sitting in a bucket of hot water when told not to sit there, and the other a natural disaster in New Zealand that got onto the front page of the Canberra Times, only because there was not much else newsworthy that day. Even the psychiatrist whom states that belief in Aboriginal culture is insanity, also says that any level of insanity I have shown is no reason to have removed from me my children.
Perhaps then regard that I have used the advantage in being white so to find out certain facts which all the Aboriginal community might benefit from, if only I am believed. Here is one which I just alluded to. There is a certain form of sihr, or black magic, which is known to be only deterred by war, as exemplified by that horseman of the apocalypse. Aboriginal Australians are defined by Terra Nullius, as inept at detecting that form of sihr. Thereby, we are being described in all our work sustaining to Peace, as fallen. Associate this to the fact of how many Australian soldiers have been sacrificed unnecessarily in strategic risks, and also in the “veiling” of the frontier violence, as though no blackfella ever fought back. As though we Aborigines are too afraid of retributive attacks to have thrown those spears.
Above all else what I can communicate about Australian racial relations is a matter that will not receive the immediate popularity that it warrants because of endemic racism prevalent. That racism of sihr, in which there is no positive future outlook. I observe that when ever white folk like myself imagine that every black skin person is more deserving of a hand up then ourself, that we attract to ourself, mainly those black skin persons whom are setting out to rip off white skin people. There are those whom really don't care that a hand up is not a hand out. Mainly but, they don't care because of the extremities of abuse they have suffered, and for generations preceding; often having lead to extreme use of drugs, and in that is the real difficulty that we are facing.
Drug use is not a black problem, it is a white problem which the black community is fallen into through their attempts to find out the causes of so as to eradicate. But drug use is a problem which thrives on black skin folk assuming that any white skin person is indebted to them. Conversely to the statement I made about whites trusting every black person, it is that when black skin communities believe that every white skin person is indebted to them, they begin to attract to their own self only those white skin persons whom are actual racists and are very much indebted to them. Pray for this to be the lesson to take from this essay; a lesson in what it will take to make Reconciliation a reality.
Reconciliation of white and black Australians has been a long term broad based goal of many Australians. It is only the occultists whom have openly refuted the social justice model of Reconciliation as a realisable outcome. Of course we all already know that blackfellas must not, and will not, trust every whitefella whom comes along with a hand out, and that whitefellas must not, and I believe that enough of us will not, assume of any blackfella that they are not deserving of a step ahead being given at our expense. But we must learn better how to draw that line. The line exists in respect of criminal action. That is the argument that black Australians have been winning against whites, and it is the argument which must be sustained. So in that, I will not shy away from exposing that there were drug users at the Aboriginal tent embassy whom believed that I deserved that my children be stolen only because I am white. They are wrong and they will learn without me needing to draw a gun. But they could never have made any impact upon my life if they had not been supported by a large contingent of whites whom are the real migaloo, and who are knowingly setting up the black community to hate white skin folk, only so as to prove evidence of reverse racism, as though such excuses their own actions against blacks. I have met such racists and know.
One of the the real racists was recently exposed in the Brisbane Courier mail, a Wayne Smith, exposed for having been collecting and 'squatting' various website domains, in which he had been placing nazi propaganda so as to try to effect a false belief that the Australian Liberal/National coalition are neo-nazis. I guess he hoped to bring out any actual extreme facist sentiment among their constituents. It was that he showed me he was squatting 'Bindi Irwin' dot com, and I exposed that fact becaue I knew that he had affiliations with those whom promote child pornography. This story is related only to the fact that those whom seriously, and religiously, believe in nazism, also believe that Animist religion is a belief that happiness is only found through abuse of children. That is the sort of idea which has currency among the criminals whom control much of what is being traded, both legitimately, and illegitimately, in Australia today. Among criminals, among police, among prison security, among the clergy; so how far have we really come since the policies of Federation. This kind of dangerous idea I am referring to, is regarded among true believers in Religion as the basis of black magic.
The worst of its currency is among those whom want to portray the methodology of pleasant gain through mass hatred, as though based in actual religion. That is, those whom practise the occult. But, among Christians, among Muslims, among Animists, Hindi, Sikh, and Buddhist, how are any of us to know who are the true believers, and whom are those opposing true belief by engaging in research of Religious merit only so as to try to prove false ideologies such as racism? The answer is to engage in your own scientific research. That is the methodology which attracted myself to Islam, and it the methodology by which within Islam, I am in open disagreement with the mainstay of that powerhouse in Mecca, but only in a few minor matters of Reconciling the fulfilment of Prophesy. It is a disagreement which has absolutely no consequence to any person whom is not a Muslim true believer; and that is the case because it is a disagreement which has absolutely no consequence to any person whom believes. In our Prayers we each find our own way for Allah is ever safe.
Some modern black consciousness oriented urban black Aboriginal persons have accused me of being their worst nightmare, and I guess this essay surely proves that I am, at the very least, my self comfortable with mental patterns of cyclical terror. But also already I can prove among believing Muslims, that if I am one man's path into perceiving terror then I can also manifest being the way out of. In truth I prefer to be regarded as only adept at pointing out what among your own, already existing, nightmares, are the reality that you will eventually die to end every trace of.
Is it a Quinkin nightmare or an Afgani heroin trade one? A girl already emprisioned under a mountain, or the world trade centre collapsing? I will let you choose to choose your own way in belief. Perhaps it is not larger a fear that of the sting ray that took Steve Irwin? I wrote an essay with a reference to him because an Aboriginal girl had told me that he is a relation, and I sent it to him posing the question, how about it mate, we could all begin to identify with those being most harmed if you begin to. Not to claim any debt owing against oppression, but only in pride. If Steve Irwin had faced us in that honesty, then we could all be enabled to identify our black hearts without risking being defined as insane, and the few who have tried so far have been. Will your own fear be recognisable in your mind is as much noblity? But perhaps you prefer to detail that the only fear is from my oddly retoric essay.
With all the hell that is being forced upon our race, how many among us can still believe. Believe in our right, a right and an ablity, to continue believing, and contribute in belief, and believe that our own self has a God given right to chose no less than to be a believer. Believing in no less than every miniscule moment in which we observe any worldly empirical evidence that any matter of Dreamtime is already realised.
At the peak of my disempowerment among urban black Indigenous populations, I thought to my self, guided by their demands of me, best just to let it be. Give them what they wanted from me, which was for me to stop telling the world that I also am an Aborigine. So I told rather more about what I am believing in, that what I biologically am. I communicated more commonly with Muslims, since my beliefs are totally compatible with. But many Muslims just could not believe that what I believe in is truly Muslim. The Why of that is a very complex scenario, which this essay has often alluded to. But the bottom line of it was that there are Muslims whom could not believe in what I know of the truth of being a Magi, which is an Arab term for the biological status of the Aborigines.
I began to bludgeon many Muslims, through very popular international discussion forums which are strickly moderated to Shari'ah, and in consequence I find that my own Aboriginal identity is stronger than it ever has been. It is the nature of Aboriginality that denial of it reinforces its instinctive survival, and I can be in no doubt, that for me, being an Australian Aborigine, is permanently.
But ought I not also provide here a bit of the details of why I am made so very dislikeable among many, whom surely I ought to be seeking the approval of as a white sister? In truth I might normally deny you that knowledge, if I am certain that I am a plaintif in the situation. That being because black Aboriginal Australians have received far too much damnation for racism against whitefellas which was never warranted. Thereby in this situation, because I mention that such has existed at all, I need also mention that the facts to the matter bear no guilt upon the part of the individuals concerned, whom I have observed to be being set up but actual far right wing, neo-nazi, criminals, whom seek to portray black Australians as culpable for their own racism. That told, now there is a safety net for the black community in my revealing what has, in truth, happened.
It was one of those real mistakes which are sometimes made, and in which each concerned party had not the full picture. A mistake of assuming to know what is not knowable. I had been, since 2001, enduring a process common among those whom first enter the Ummah of Islam, in which the individual is pressured into mental acknowledgement of their worst fears, and then those fears are sustained in their mind within a condition of respite from being given, only when the person refutes any sinful want. That is, it becomes so that the only pleasure that is extractable from life, is that pleasure of being a self decent member of Human society by having refused to act upon a myriad of wanton desires which might creep into the mind.
The technique is startlingly effective.
It is a technique which is also utilised by traditionally oriented Australian Aborigines.
However, in the very first aspect of the process, what the person's actual poor desires are, need to be found to be mentally confronted. In that part of the process Islam as it is known in the Arabic language, uses a startingly different process to that of Aboriginal Australians. Well, in fact, the Aboriginal process is the larger startle.
What happens in that process is that a person is just let to enact, within community approval, that which they want but know is wrong. Whereupon nobody will blame them, but every body will know that that behaviour is the key to turning that person into an animal at the point of their own death. The teaching is made available that we ought to be fighting that want in an individual internal Jihad, and that resistance to wants is aided in many instances. But for an Aborigine, some wants you just are not going to get any community help with. However, nobody is meant to ever reinforce those wants either. That such manifests in the modern context is the work of racists to cause that Aborigines seem to be in greater fault than is real.
What happened was simply that a young Goorie Gentleman was testing my self so as to find out what I was really wanting. What would be fun for me? His timing was, by no fault of his own, entirely disaligned with that of the Arab Elders whom were, at that time, monitoring my process from afar. In that Arab Islam process I was at the position of needing to enact self denial of wants. But the young Goorie had assumed that I was only denying being in any want, and that the process was a Muslim one of preventing me from being imposed upon to acknowledge in what aspects my behaviour might be alike to an animals. That is, he was investigating whether I could be wanting fun in what he was wanting fun in, so as to confront our fear of death together in learning what animal we each are to become upon our death.
Actually he wanted to marry me. But eventually was unable to trust that I am also within Aboriginal culture. Not only because of this situation, but because he had been repeatedly misinformed about me by those others in his community whom were finding that their drugs became cheaper if they rebuked my Aboriginality. They turned out to be buying drugs from the same sources as persons whom know my children's father, whom has removed my children from me by accusing me of insanity for ever having associated with any Aboriginal man as a prospective Husband.
What could I do in the situation but reconcile the esoteric teaching of Islam with that of Aboriginal Australia. Even though that work has landed me only the title of being an Islamo-fascist. Actually it is extraordinarily interesting in the world of the psychology sustaining to socialism. That reconciliation is immediately recognisable as the same mental process in my own mind, as was my first learning of the mathematics of the theory of the tendancy for the rate of profit to decline. In general the psychology of theology is fascinating work, and as I have told, give me Religion anyday above heroin or other substance abuse. Even the hunger of Ramadan is better than good Christmas over-indulgence. Not many folk know that heroin is an addiction to fear, but that is why they keep on doing it. The pleasure is not what they are seeking so much as to avoid the crap that soaks into their bones if they fail to sustain the key of remembering what there is in reality to be afraid of, which heroin can amply supply. Marx's critique is so valid that I don't wonder if he had ever been prescribed an opiate.
Am I a white racist who is adopting to herself such a large field of identification that I am scandalous in exposing the extent of theft from the words Indigneous folk and true religious believers? That is what most folk arrive at in trying to place me. But I believe that there is only one way to combat racism. By accepting in dignity and self certainty the sanctions existing within the culture of the persons with whom you share what you can see as an external biological difference.
That is, if my behaviour in mainstream Australian culture is sanctioned by a supposition of eventual death being caused by in the situation named A, but not in the situation named B, C, or D, and then in Indigenous culture I will be sanctioned at death at point D, but not point A, B, or C, while in Islam I share with the non-whites of America I might be sanctioned quite heavily at point B, then I'd be rather bereft if I lived only to C. Many persons would look at the situation and think I must be culture hopping, when it A think like an American, when in D think like a white Aussie, etc. But truth be told nobody would ever be able to trust me then.
Truth be told is that to effectively integrate one community with the next, and to inter-culturally communicate, we must accept the sanctions of every culture in every context. So here I am sanctioned a A, B, D, and low and behold my Vietnamese neighbourhood want to sanction me at C. So I am getting dead all around. And yet I live. But that is for the time being only. The truth of successful inter-cultural relations and Religious integration, and all work against racism, is that we must accept the negative of one another's culture or we only end up even deader.
Deader than dead, now that, well, that, that is my own account in Allah and it is not between you and me, widespread though it may have been supposed to be. Allah is a word for God which means essential accountiblity; the essential accountiblity of everything existing and our own being a part of; that mental state in which we can be certain that it is not our own individuality which accords that we are sanctioned, but rather a oblique and emorphous everthing that is life. Will you put your hand up with me to receive the sanctions of the black indigenous Australian community? Then learn to love existing in the commas by the Grace of the endlessness of everything existing, by which you are able to be certain that we are not alone in life. Even in the valley of the dead we will remember.
What this essay is about is the spectrum of how and why blame goes wrong. I have individually lived through a myriad of instances in which my being alive was faulted for the crimes of whom-so-ever faults me. Usually those tricked themselves about who had blamed their lives wrongly. I have lived to tell that I believe in the story about the Maori prostitute, she told me herself, but that I believe is because they have tried to do it also to me. Why? Because the criminals and corrupt police who want to set up good mothers to blame, are also those whom are profiting from children. They impose upon the mother's distant and removed child, a fear of their own device, which the mother locks up tight when raped so as to.
The biological normality of being able to forgive children is what has been raped, and forced to become the forgivers of every customer who hates any child. By which the profiteers hope to sell to their clients a supposition that they will be permanently cleansed of acts never to bear remembering outside of the death they bring. Is it any wonder then that Humanity has begun to Dream in Hell.
So let me tell you a solution already long learned well. Each one among us is, for better not worser, enabled to never blame another person again. We are all learning that to even believe no other person ever did wrong, of course within protecting ourselves from what they fell into wanting of wrongs, but to believe that they did not do it to themselves, is ever more beneficial in outcome, than to try to find fruit in others mistakes by seeking blood in the herds of stereotypical appearances we all formulate. What ever it is that might likely be, or not be, is because we can see what we are wanting that which is worthy of our mind, which is to find the causes of what is wrong with mankind. We buy because we want to find, why can they afford not to need this thing, and so sell.
Fundamentally the economy of buying and selling is in every ancient cause of all negative racial discrimination. It is not that the discrimination is caused by the differences, but that the differences are caused at the outset by a discriminating outlook. But when we fail to be accurate in what we discriminate, the we fail each other in respect of biological race. Negative discrimination in respect of appearances, or of our general ability to discern what is true, which by rights we should be able to show accurately upon our faces, is what has caused every problem of sterotyping blame even within races. If ever has been there time it has been time to stop blaming and make reconciliation. Given that a few cents worth is worthy of words of wealth, how about we all try a little harder to give instead of to sell. Perhaps when I notice any fault, if I only give away what I see, the we really will be that egaltarian society Reynolds aspired to in his youth. Give it away to who, must be who will not blame whom ever it is we see any fault to, neither our eye perceiving. Reality's fire burns away that desire to find what is wrong rather than what is already right. Remember that when you accuse you are communicating only that you also are culpable, and then gradually will we be able to see only true.
OK, so we know that if racism is apparent that the world is going wrong, and we know that if substance abuse is apparent the world is going wrong, but what else do we really know? I could tell you all about how there are American Muslims struggling to reconcile Islam with their own indigenous belief and practise, that they are struggling to hold accountible all those fundamentalist Christians whom have joined in with portraying Islam as all that is wrong with the world, and that those very same Christians are both sustaining the present day ruling sect in Saudi Arabia, and also critically holding them faulted for specific sectarian angles upon Islam. Not to mention that they are accounting for themselves as those meritable with the worth also of Aboriginal Australians. Where is all that money coming from? How can we possibly begin to conceive of obtaining any money by knowing that they are wrong while they simply continue to extract wealth from our own labour by falisfying corruption among us? This is the real terror of us all is it not? It is the key to why Karl Marx once wrote that Judaism is the Religion of the accumulation of capital. Not that it is either an American key specifically. Every nation has its loosers.
Meanwhile the poor Arabs have been so busy proving their Humanity that they forgot only to notice that we are all in this natural kingdom of Earthly vows together. Each to our own nature in remembering that Jahannam, that terror of hell which we are taught in Islam every possible means to escape, is no more or less than the transition of death, but within conscious mental, that is Spirit, function. To an Australian Aborigine the transition is far more acceptible, but no more so than to any believer among Muslims. Surely one day we all become transfigured through the grave and worms, microbes and airbourne bacteria, into a new physical formula of living matter. In Aboriginal cosmology it is that we are turned into a bird or a rock or a plant or an animal. The very good even turn into stars. Then again may we have that rare chance of being gifted with the opportunity to make a real go of being true to our essential nature and love of life, as a Human. One day there are enough of us who make it as a perfected Human form, so that socialism will happen, and that is the truth of every prophesy of every real religion. I never get why the socialists don't like the believers in God, because if we can't make the Revolution inshallah (in the will of Allah), how can it?
Allah knows we all Love the Arabs, but they haven't yet figured out what Qur'an teaches us Australians to learn from Spinifex and Termites, about reforestation. But it is time to reconcile this story. Reconcile Heaven and Earth into Hell to pay? If so, it is truly only to find that Hell is really only that burning of death, and is emminently endurable. Even as Mr. Hawkings maths has already proven, that a particle of light may exit a black hole, only so long as it has been recorded entering the black hole. A perfect reconciliation of pure light, with nothingness. Or is it rather that nothingness is only that fact of being not sure when is now? Reconciliation is. Reconciliation of Torah and Qur'an began in the Warsaw Ghettos, inevitably, but that knowledge is only accessible in the esoteric Kingdom. Reconciled into no less that what Jesus taught. Three books are one, in Hope, Faith and Love, One God, one book of his record of the passage of time. Reconcilation of black and white skin is only that you are breathing. Reconcilation of the invasion of Australia with our Australian indigenous worth, and find yourself living in a sane black culture, Dreaming Forever is Today.
iii Turner, Howard, R., University of Texas Press, 1995, Science in Medieval Islam: an illustrated Introduction.
(if that’s not enough then here is dull poetry to make you want to write yourself into my story and a poetry editor, and if you are lucky, or unlucky as your luck is yours to mind, you might even find, some are vaguely related to money.)
Have I any better rhyming To put my pen toThat writing about my own poetryAnd why I am writing it to youHave you any better methodFor learning what we are tryingTo get these few words grafted Into your mentally sublime findingThis poem you are readingOne to know whyI am methodically feedingTo your mind my wry style
Justice For
The Leaven is Justice
For this Societal Veil
My identity as a socialist
Is never so pale
As when frightened by loss of
Our communal concepts of
Justice
In which lawyers
And doctors
Are denied common ground
With each other
And with workers
Of lower classes of pay
When we can be classless today
This is the lack of Justice
In which is born two way
Two way white way
Two way black way
Two way business identity
Two way capitalist veil
Two way communally known
Two way shown Dreamtime way
Justice for today
For everybody knowingly
Certain in why
That we find
A Dream has not
The count of an act
A white man not
The mind of a black
So what measure can be
That in the real Dreamtime
Not that pie in the sky
When we were Dreaming up Antarctica
All day frozen and dry
Belief in Social Justice
For the penguins don't I
When they need for Justice they die
Justice for Aborigines
Justice for workers
Justice for the poor
Justice in education
Justice in belief system
Without Justice we fall nigh
And might die in a lie
Social Justice is no Justice
Without Justice for all
Out of that Sky with a pie
Of a hole in our mind
Dreamed upon how many lifetimes long
Of reparations from capitalists and racists
Is the way of our lesson in
Social Justice
Must begin
It is never being denied
The will to workers
Work for our whole life
Not for money and lies
Justice for mind
Justice for society
Justice because it is time
To bake our own bread
No more class pies
Lets have real Social Justice instead
My Five Sense Worth
Crumbs
Crud
Mud
Bud
Sheep
Shonk
Bleat
Bonk
Meat
Wrap
Feet
Flap
Street
Feat
Did
That
Sheep
Meat
Cheap
Trick
Sheep
Shank
Sweet
Panic
Sweet
Chick
Cheep
Stick
Neat
Prick
Your
Fit
Child
Mild
Blamed
Wild
Do
You
Know
Who
They
Did
To
Who
Forgone conclusion
No illusion
Law abiding
This riding
The tiding
Whose finding
For posterity
No majority
Abiding
Moon's truth
Who is Ruth
Your vote
Streuth
Delusionary bloat
Fuelled by an oat
Of time
Done fine
I am your boat
Who in it will float
To know
What did show
Was that if you can't believe me though
Now round
And found
Past made
This day
One Planetary Love
Like a glove
Don't shove
It is two
With a thud
Crumbs
Crud
Mud
Bud
Dear
Year
Bring
Good cheer
This day
You play
Mud man
Van way
For they
Do their way
Ice age stage
Made today
Moon's tide
This wide
Swoon buffoon
Long already no man's pride
Mud
Crud
Man
Thud
I found a Prophesy
What did it say
What's it to you
But that here to stay
Maintain the rage
Dear Australia
Rage against
The identity that ain't
In rage to swallow
A new tomorrow
Hell's lesson no beer
For race relations in good cheer
Is a passage made
In reality's fear
This day strange
To the tides of rage
This world's claim
We make our own page
For our own home in Jannah
Is this the stage
Before now is time
For that blunder too fine
Long grassers disguises
Rise up in rhyme
Not by your five cents
Nor buying two cents
But mine
The five sixth sense
Long grass
Swagman
True and false sense
Not black or white that fence
In this fight
We will be
Tonight
Alright
We all fell to love and only love
Whose way
Might
Bud
Bud
That is the essay as it was in the form it had been connected to many more poems and a couple of other essays in preparation for publishing as a book. These three poems above were always its accompaniment. However since that time, back in early January 2007, it now being 8th May 2007, a few events have occurred which have changed the social conditions somewhat.
The most obvious thing is that I have had an black skinned Aboriginal mother, born into a family without any intermarriage with the invaders in her background, and her five year old son, staying at my house. They were travelling with a white step father of English ancestry, and had landed among the Brisbane homeless where an old man, whom is my friend, a John Nawakie, guided them into the idea of staying at my house, where there are bedrooms available for my children. I will tell a bit about their stay with me and the history of it, before placing at the tail of this publication a set of poetry, portions of which my fears which have been stimulated by their stay, have inspired within the context of an exorcists task.
They have stayed with me for about two weeks. Eventually I could stand the white man no longer, but not because he is a bad man. I noticed a few very odd things.
He was in the same patterns of being emotionally abusive towards his black female partner, as I have experienced from a black man who was my sexual partner for a time. But in both contexts the nature of any problems in the intimate relationship was being explained by the black community as belonging to the general problems of racism.
So there is an obvious query which rose in my mind about why these two men were behaving within the same pattern of abuse towards family. I have observed my male friend in a similar pattern towards his mother. But often the way he had treated me was being put down to a matter of what happens between white and black people. Also it seems that too often the mother who was staying with me is assuming that her partner being abusively ignorant of her needs, is about his white skin. But what I am reporting is that he is certainly not acting within any white person's cultural pattern.
So the question arises about what the white step father and my friend have in common. The clearly obvious fact at the outset is that both have been raped in the prison system, but what eventually became apparent, is that both have been raped in prison, within a set of conditions in which they were being “prepared” for being given the “favour” of a job in the prison kitchen.
This fits with the nature of the emotional abuse which both are trapped into enforcing upon a woman. It relates to cooking.
What I reported to the relevant authorities is that the son is not at all a sad child and had no acting out of any fears which are not age appropriate for a five year old. He is slightly under exposed to the standard of experiences of 'object manipulation' which will be necessary for him to undertake when in a pre-school or primary school environment. Lacking experience with what is called ‘object manipulation’ is very normal for all Aboriginal children, since Aboriginal culture never teaches to identify with inanimate objects, except for natural land forms, but rather teaches to identify with signs of life. I observed this amply with his not having yet skills with drawing on paper, or following pictures on paper as a set of instructions for putting lego pieces together. However the mother made use of the children's literature at my house for reading to him. I also noticed that even though he is still in a nappy, that he is able to get into the bath and clean up his mess himself if he poos his nappy and the mother is not immediately in attendance. There was also an instance in which the step father instructed the child to go to the toilet, but when the child did not immediately go and do a poo in the toilet, the step-father lost his temper, and screamed at the child. The step-father even then said to the mother that they might as well just take the child straight to the department of families and give him up since he was never going to get out of nappies. The step father was very angry and the situation warranted no anger what so ever. That was the point at which I became unable to tolerate them staying on in my own home, although I am regretful in the context of the mother and son’s need, I can not afford myself to further tolerate the step father. He makes all use of the kitchen extremely disruptive. As though every act of cooking, even boiling a kettle, is cautioning us all to potential threats. The whole situation is emotionally draining at a time when I can ill afford that because I have my own family court case in hearing again very soon.
In the circumstances both mother and son have been living off junk food, and the son is eating much too much chocolate. Given his level of consumption of chocolate and the step father’s extreme anger about the toilet, I will here make a statement of support for the mother having been keeping the son in nappies, even though he is five and should have begun school by now. This is necessary, especially in that I have asked for the relevant authorities to help this young family, but mainly because they are already well within the world of being supervised by those authorities whom are sanctioned by Government to remove children whose safety is at risk in their parents care. These three people have been on the run from State to state from such authorities, but without any real need beyond there existing eating disorders, having been caused by psychological and emotional abuse.
There was not indications of any violence from the step father towards the mother or the child, but there was ample indication that the mother is very often causing that her behaviour is not what she wants it to be, but is rather what will cause that the step father need not loose his temper. On the evening he lost his temper he had set it up, because he was threatening to unless the mother and son accompany him into the City over night to await a 2.30 am payment being received into their accounts, but then in their preparations to go with him, he also lost his temper. While they were away I moved their things out of my house, because the period they had paid me rent for was finished, and I did not want to have to face the step-father trying to give me more money for staying longer, because I knew he would be very hard to say no to. I am myself susceptible to the pattern of using food to abuse, and so needed not to be confronted. He seems to be holding it over the mother, as though he has one up on her, that while at my house, I cooked more often than she, and I am a white woman with three children already all removed from me, so I must be a worse mother. While the mother visiting me is a black mother with only one child removed from her, who lives with her brother at an Aboriginal mission in the far north tropics, and with one child still in her custody, so she should clearly be enabled to lead me in any kitchen. The fact of the matter is that she and I, both being of the same classification in Aboriginal Kinship, had agreed that as I am her senior by eight years, my function as older sister, should cook and in general monitor levels of providence to her and her son. Every support service this young family will be needing has been informed of all my observations.
After I spoke with the social worker about my observations, I have become more observant of the general degree to which these same patterns are current in the whole population of persons effected by their male folk having been raped in the prisons. I believe that if the problem can be isolated only to those whom have worked in prison kitchens, that there may be a way to conceive of its solution far more readily. But I am quite afraid of even expressing what I can perceive to any person whom is themselves effected by the pattern, because every time I express that I can perceive a pattern exists, and so a solution, the pattern plays into becoming threatening towards me.
Significantly the Aboriginal mother who stayed with me, is looking forward to her own mother being released from a life sentence in prison later this year. She told me that a few years ago, before her second son became born, she went into prison, having become a criminal, only so as to see and spend time with her mother. She grew up with no mother in her daily life as a teenager, but shows every sign of being very forgiving of her son, and his manners and attitude are near to perfect at all times except when exhausted. They only lack access to the resources of the knowledge about modern mainstream cultural standards, and as Aborigines have been systematically prevented from adhering to their own culture of origin for as many generations as the invaders have been in this land. This land here being Queensland, the State of Australia which had an Act of Parliament upon which South Africa’s apartheid legislation was based after long research to find the most suitably racist. This land in which an Aborigine was not regarded as a citizen until a referendum in 1967, and with the 40th anniversary of that history mark only now weeks away, this story must be dedicated to every Aboriginal mother. Because we are who can disprove that any fact of any hatred towards children ever had any social function.
There follows here a few more poems, which are grouped into a set made which I have given the file name “Envy Set”. But they are a set of poems, many of which manifested as a consequence of the visit to my house of a black Aboriginal mother, her youngest son, and a white man.
Some Poems About Sort of Stuffing Around
Food
The food style wiz
Gaol kitchen's did
By the racial hatred bid
Christmas retrievable
From Chris Cringle
The sellers market swindle
In this spindle
Of straw spun into
Golden thread
Fruit mince pie
Five of a kind
Two buried
Two eaten instead
For next time in plenty
Well been read
Twice enough rice
Is best left that fight
Won for this land alright
The first sorry heard by
Was not for to party and fly
But for prayer tonight
Since to cut the cheese
Had there please
Been the story of
Who sees right
What cattle might
That milk better be no fright
The cards read
Ten ace ace
Diamond spade heart
Clubs four of
Only the joker missing
But bread and farts
The King of spades
Seven diamonds say
Six clubs today
Up top
Upon the fridge
That had hid
Her hair told yet
Brushed distractible
Antennae's fishing
But no lies are retractable
Who could the children be ringing
Lettuce rotting
Too much plastic forgotten
Meat pies too long
Gone what on
Old and cold
But the vegetable
Perhaps salvageable
To whom knew
With what heart to
Marry that no can
Could rent the farrow
Neither love go sallow
No more fan
Plant yarrow
The beef gone wild
Had no right
My kangaroo and peach
Pomegranite koresh
Eaten well might
Clean out cook's bite
Pumpkin scones won a run
Because it ain't no compliment
To be found clean
By a sodomist
Silver tailed spleens
The sacrifice
Remember your own life
Owns the right
For death alone to account
What Allah likes
Cricket players dive
To catch a mouse
Will who write
When we are what we eat
Is our house our mind
But turning into couch potatoes
Who was it that ate you
And could they chew
Wrote not the cow who knew
Better than to
What the bacteria in its poo
Could do
Was only find
That the kind
Of pattern of mind
Being forced up the but
Of the cook's of doves
Is that kills when it knows enough
But yet food will
A war for famine
To win is still less barren
Than death's will
Your own hill
Over mine is born my own self styled fill
Can Child Done Cool
The race to have did done
What some supposed might be fun
Was a race they hosed
With what no adult could suppose
Has had many children's minds
Forced into the patterns of lust
Such
Yet the mind of the child
Ever so mild
If schooled in truth
Will never abide
So what is done
Must
Bread and Farts
The wider concept
That to carry
Forebodes no precept
But of their marriage
Who was it forgot it
Shall be that
Recollection
Of what we ever knew
At
The elation
Of only what is true
A match too large
But yet did do
That the pain to bear at
How had you knew
She is not to walk so fast as
What his want needed her to
But faultless his
Part upon this
Since of bread and farts
His bottom dollar fits
As Black as Them
‘They’ imagine
That “taking”
Is getting
Stress
From being
Associated
With whiteness
Such that
There is
No consolidation
Of their meaning
In being
Blackest
Yet appearance is
But never the whether
Of the mind's feather
So never mind
Those who
Base their status
On being as black as
What is blacker than
Life existing
From a Bee for the Birds
If birds focus upon the walk
They forget their thoughts
And abuse their own mind
With ideas unkind
About what they might
Be in truth attuned with right
Despite
The ever present doubt of flight
For conscience too their life
So believe their plight
Is to know for certain
So soon that they seem
To have been
Whom did cause what we all might do
But not to
And including you and me
And every bee
Since we be able both ways
But they the only safety sure
Is the feathered score
Since otherwise the Ants stake
Is all that they take
Those whose ultimate fall
Is eternally to the bird call
And Ant bodies all
Will bee’s honey thus be for
Only so far this call
Lies on Fire
It won’t work
To tell a lie
Though I have done to try
But never done that could I
For it’s just not my style
But for the dry
Time in my hair fine
This will I
ENVY STREAM
I think that my sister
Stole my chances of finding
Any husband who I could ever be
Reminding
In life
Do not steal of your wife
Her love of children
Nor her vanity nice
But wait until she gives of
That way be right
So will my sister be paying for me
Through her grave done deal
With death too real
Is a military feel
And its key
Who is she
But a nobody
If her time and place
Never take face
Stolen Tears
This month
Is approaching
The date of
Four years exact since
The police, family, school, and ex-defacto
All believed lies about me
Spun by who knew them to be
Only lies for making money
Based in no real evidence
This is not funny
Since they removed from me
My children three
Not yet back in my custody
Through false accusations
There had been imagined
No way out for me
From the station
Of lies about me
But I am supposed to inevitably
Be becoming their lie about me
No matter how depraved they made be
As though possible for me
Yet all the while
So imagining
They supposed to better had save my children
From only that they did to me
So I sit here still today fuming
Seething and hating
The whole world of all that is
Which conspired to take advantage in this
In anger too deep to express
Already having plotted that passage
Of how those who benefit today
Put me into this mess of their play
And as the minutes tick by
I find
Having entered into the moments of years
Arriving in a count now of five
Can there be
No further possibility
For redemption of any
Of who simply refuted me
When in clear sight of better evidence
Bar my children who’ve been under duress
Since the advantage of many against me
Had pleasure upon what is never
As that their own debts were owed by me
So unless
The real evidence
Is examined accepted and justice served through
Will it be those who
Denied my tune
Whose fall will not find redemption
Their better selves among who
Are paying already
That this written to you
Yet nothing exists
Which compensation could satisfy
The burning inside
For five years of my children’s time
Stolen in crime
Against the humanity of every
Human being that it takes a rhyme
To remind
You must fear this
An outcome not to be ever again
Forever is never if and when
Upon which the humanity
Of every
Man woman and child
Depends
Has my heart hardened
To be certain
I will hate to death alright
Every person
Who ever harmed
The idea of any child
In innocence
And never might I accept
Any accusation of forcing
Upon the world
The course of
The debts to repay will be
For mine is to hold you to through me
That time
One rhyme
Clothing Shame
That covering in shame
White skin needing clothing
Is covering no game
For accustomed we are
To the vanity of ugly
Situations and station
Airs and graces
Outfits and faces
Slammed out like to beauty
Such that to uncover
The reality
Of God’s glory
In life sustaining
Health becoming
Well loved face
Is too far tempting
Of wrong doing
That in shame have we learned
To cover up truth and innocence
As though that criminal
But then what would be this
If you’d been let on in at
Such that black
Skin’s protection
The only real win
Forever no sin
Its observance
The shamelessness of well loved time
Did it say we will all be what, who me?
Know in me
Being Muslim means only
Obedience to willingly
Obeying the will of
Allah almighty
His teaching
All around us
If only
We choose to find it
Are prophesy’s being revealed
Have modern Churches of Jesus
Foundations in Qur’an
In Hijab
And Europe’s own Jihad
So believe this in me
I will never expect you be
Able to believe me
Until you find
Your own evidence known
Of Islamic certainty
Eternity be
Wiccan the first
Church of Jesus
Synagogue of Satan caught by
Through Islam in disguise
Is no special deal
For every who knows of
The details so caught because
Only real believers
Will see
Or care to believe
That therein is the
Total economy
Caught in one key
Whose but those fallen
Only in me
Since I am my self in entirety
Submitted
Surrendered
Forever all mind is
In Allah through this
What would open it
Of hope of war
Has hope of faith
No more
But for famine poor
The faith of hope’s new score
Twice now for pestilence
There is a door
In death’s own true floor
Childhood Exposed Raw Never Chose
I once
Knew greed
No work
Did need
Alone uncovered
The bone exposed
Was my fear
That I showed
This less known
Childhood state
Never that my own
Causation to have known
How I came to be caught
In its interminable state
Would for ever have been safe
If only never our fears of its gate
Cook Shit
Cook’s bait
Nice light
Their hate
Don’t take
Since the blacker
You are
To their accusing
Your whiteness
The fatter
They get
Upon your blindness
To their harder
Accusing
Of your looking
At what it is
You could be taking
Most especially
If helpfully
So just
Don’t
Take
Cook’s hate
But the whiter
You take never
Accusing forever
Then the better
The trap
You set
For the famine
Of racial discrimination
The oven’s no more
The place for
Nor
Whatever
Your next
Association
With what they hate you for
Since the cook
Never the mother took
How far the fall who for
It is right
In the white fight
To let your self fall
As far as the floor
Of what you and your lover
Might have to discover
About each other
In this land of each other’s
Enemy’s and death wishes
For have all of us sisters
Cousins and brothers
Realised what it is
We are hating in
Each other’s embraces
Or is it our real disgrace
That we slept with our enemy
So far to accept likely
The enemy’s fate
In this war of who will take
What sort of state
Is it true we have to
Release our sustenance
Just to learn of each other
What real love is
And how is it we
Know so to retain
Perfect self restraint
In any and every
Moment of doubt
In each other about
Knowing this war of invasion
The country Australia
Has born these few hundred years counting
For the wars of all ages
Now so caught between
Our enemy and ourselves seen in his envy
Are we
Justly ready
To end with
This world that is
Able by the few whose toil’s for
Keeps apart who is who
The soil for
For what is right
Is that your might be of your own life
Belonging to the site
Your biology receives of
So done are the Dreams of
Turning the Games inside
Of the entrapment
By females
Of males
Into seeming to be
The problem
By women’s playing at being the victim
Is that all decent men I know
Have been too scared to show
Their real urge to protect
My vulnerable show
I first had been entrapped
That no other self I know
But use it by purpose now to entrap also
Those other sorts of men
The sexual predators
Don’t you know
There must be a safe course of flow
For sexual relations to go
But nobody ever taught me so
Yet just let it be so
Only when there are no
Accusations that force
Innocence to hoe
Fertile soil in rows
For un-needed deprivations
So how to begin
Be unafraid to win
By letting love in
To hold account of our sin
Is to never confuse
Accusatory steps rude
Of unfounded acceptance
Rather just point to
Observations of weakness
Highlight-able in the stress
What has no place
In happy family fates
And wait
For who loves you
Will accept of you
The un-stitching of
Their entrappment bare
Until alike to
The Siamese twins stare
That this is
Child’s knowledge
Will tell
How safe is
Society that this
Forever that which
Will let its entrappment
Unstitch
With love’s real hitch
When Entrappment No Victim Bent
When Tar
Of Thanksgiving
Becomes the
Difficulty in
The sit-
Uation this is
Why entrappment is
That any threat be
What is best made
Pre-emptively since
If you ignore
Then they might
If real dirt against
Yet if you oppose
Then worse
Is their opposing glow
Of assuming guilt
Disguises itself
So show
Yet the fear you know
If you show also
Is the threat comparable
Don’t just think so
But be certain
This is so
That avoiding
What had been threatened
As though in guilt real
Might certainly be taken to feel
The hate of the score
Of a threat sore
Your timing who threatened
With the wrong of for
Having frightened you so
Needs its real consequence to sow
Is that if ever
I never pre-empted
The crime I am accused with
And a few are I never could
In case caught into causing
Then must I threaten
Who frightened me with threats
That might or might not be real
Or I might change the tune with my steel
For I will trip them up into
The fall in the crime of
Having threatened me
Or maybe not so
And which ever way they go
Why how frightened I am
Of that also
Needs the certainty that
Every victim can buy that
By habit
And learn it to swallow
The truth not hollow
Of what had been entrapment at
And will we thus learn to please
Interrupt just at
Feed the hate of ourselves false that
And collapse to fear certain
No curtain
In the consequence learned and
Of death done by one
Fully remembering
This sum experience
Is not what I wanted
And since am forced into
Without escape possible
Why I find my will is
To its wrong take
So imposing my self certain
Knowing death in this learning
Upon who had so trapped me in
To feeling bad only for taking in harder
This will to even so
Begin
Terrible
In think I fell in love with a fellow
I am not meant to
Or is it that I am
And Terrible
How did anybody ever
I did always hate
The very idea of a date
Because of its assuming
Real sexual relations
Un-arranged by broader social function
Yet this state
In which I write poems
Is that in fate
Of not the kind
Of social relations
Around and surrounding
Conducive to any sort of
Assumption that happy marriages
Might get arranged
In these conditions so strange
So in general
Stress continues
And my anger seething
Usually suppressed feeling
Or used for baiting
Those who would fault me
Into further vulnerability
Still hoping
Somehow its condition
Will discontinue
Did a peculiar thing
Happen to me
While sitting barefoot
In public
Late one night
Approached by a stranger
Deciding to take him
As a harmless unit of population
With a nice face
And safe feel
Seemingly too drunk
For friendship to begin real
He was not following through with
The instructions from his
Mates on the telephone
To get back to their place
So I lead him
Back to them
As a favour
From a stranger
Said goodbye
And but
When is whey
Is why that
I keep feeling
As if we had sex
So fuming and seething
More and more daily teething
A new bite function
Needing his welcome
Might I complain to him
You see my vulnerability
Well it really was needing
A Husband
Not a strange drunk
Because at its heart is
The fact in bread and farts this
That I can’t sell myself as junk
Can’t undersell
My ware that is to tell
The real lawful way through
Many and most of
All sorts of social functions
When in dysfunction
My mind has combated
All wrongs through
That I know how
Any child could every good deed do
And wrongs any I can undo
Yet the wrapper
I come in
Has no social function
Though its skill is
An exorcist if a wife
Matchmaker and
Midwife
Yet how so promoting
Can I
Of my real self worth
Who would vote in
Since its fate has been
That in learning
Has any exorcist
The terror of eternity to face
And a grate over
The drains of plenty
That waste did send me
And my reputation
Though quite equitable
To my station
Bears nothing at all of
My real skill this ball has
So fuming daily is looming
Some strange new relation
With a stranger whose name I
Forgot to ask him
But why
When our minds already
Fully locked in tight
Yet our timing
While only yet together
No longer
Than a two hour
Walk with each other
Like making love
That this I write
Such my temper
That my mind today threatened
About his five month ex-girlfriend
Perhaps I could fall to
Do her myself if
My anger gets worse
Just out of spite
Then I lay down to rest
To find my mind dreamed right
Into their nest
All the while assuming
My own future to be its truth
But for the love in his wish
Would I not have detected this
So by motion imposed
Alone I had known
To forewarn him and cease from
Supposing
I might be his new girlfriend
For of real love this has a true roof
Never I to risk his youth
My own body never before felt so strong
So easily pushed into getting sore
Nor so light of hoof
Yet this seven-eight-teenth day since
We met
Could I not help but the truth get
Somehow his ex
Had her money
Counting against me
And he sussed it
But yet
He did not perhaps well suss me
My determination will pay
Since taking this the hard way
Have I pulled myself up and out of
His ex
Girlfriends misery
Is no pleasure for me
And of my own measure
Only a minor spender she
But this will never be
Unless in truth he
Decides to conspire with me
Since I only so drifted
Into his past so shifted
Through looking into a future
Of him with me
But figured out the past scene
By only supposing
I might just tell him
Not to go confusing
His ex-girlfriend
Or any new future one
With me
So believe you also of me
If he now fails to find me
Since my efforts for him
In the time since we met
Have proven already
Me who made too high a payment
The night we met
He might so then live to regret
Having stirred me
Before seething quite peacefully
But that I wrote this
Is to set
The certainty I can only get
Is that the positive consequence
Already outweighing any negative
Therefore that man will be mine yet
If only my self will he own as me mine to be
Face known
In of these poems
About him some be
All written after first we met
My self now fully pulled up
Short in relating to his life
Story with an ex-girlfriend not mine to tell of
I think he’ll have more wives
Than just me
Mine this is to tell
Because did he
Yet realised my timing
In relation to his
Does this
Since I myself
Can’t get out of it
And can’t find why this is
Yet find a new wrapper
Comes with it
Even if not yet He
So perhaps I find
In these times
Since our astrology not well aligned
By some mishap of ancestors time
For he aligns with a migaloo sister of mine
It might be me
Who decides
To establish
Some self decent
Dating etiquette
For how else will I
Win this
And the name game
I can readily rubbish is
Since names change
But never the time and place
But the ball I never caught in the first place
Had names written all over the place
And seems now to have just rolled back
To my feet
He might begin with an “eS”
To my “aR”
For who is it
Important when
In mind not body
But then
If in bodily walk
Since times place ever talks
He will have to met me to be
Be questioning
Whose social relations are these
Let
Let me tell you
That I know how
To get on with
A black man
But of white like me
Well how do we
At least black men
Could acknowledge me
As not being only
Too silly
But clever at hiding
Real meaning
While white folk
Pretend and accept
Of each other not to get
But when once met
Another decent
Just can not in believe it
Eternity is Accountability
Elohim Allah
Will I be able to name him all
He who is first and forever
Even when I knew never
Elohim Allah is why I am that I weather
His Holy unending Grace
In each matter of my own will I face
His indivisible mercy
So not one might I disgrace
In no cry of mine
Could I first have named He
Elohim Allah will I be
For His unknowable worth
We ride our own hurst
In His strong standing Grace
That we have no face
Elohim Allah every Jinn be in His seen
Unending Forever Indivisible Together
If every word I know for
I could string out this poem for
What would I amount to at all
But that I am too poor
In every other of life's calls
I am responsible for
Every name when breathed who calls
Except His Absolute one and all
Of God being His Forgiving me
By his forgiveness thus
Speak Elohim Allah with me
That every word could be his name in Eternity
Except that I know my own responsibility
So by only my own breath will I be
The Fairly Traded Poems Zone
The Redressing of Fair Trade The re-dressing of knowing No good consequence flowing In being the market For capitalist accumulation Of purchasing of any commodity For who made the sale Was done no favour By being lead astray So as to believe In profit making Of their own buying If not directly then in shading That fair trading’s shade What of baiting Black people Into drug using As white would While who set the bait Had a cup full of Strange juice ofStolen Grace ofVery too many medicines the diet
Thus now so very quietKnowledge of Shamanic might Know how for imposed So stolen off unwanted cows Swallowed in no dogs hollow fowl Had you never knowing The truth in But only that which withstood Wrongful blaming
Is who lives
Who takes interminable shaming
A Spell breaking Spell to a Nana Will:
Can you see what I see
We could never have been the doer
Of Ever we were aligned to one day wake up
Of deeds we are done
Of women’s eyes seeing self the world
A frame filtering our Soul’s terror of
What are we done’d before knowing into
Yet Man of God you that I
Your eye can see
Only world of reality
In dot part through the filter we are of Soul be self
That I need you
My world to see
Of Forgiven Karma, I bee
I yam
Am three
That somebody had to try to stop thee
Everlasting life becomes Human by each our capability
Already Freckled
Skin shade tight
Though itself non too brown
That no fairer is
Until it scratched an itch
If you please
Finding underneath
To be whiter than cheese
While a companion
Browner patch of skin
Already manifesting
The freckle is
And white the mind
Of whose animal
Knows to so manifest
Is the only innocence
Here is a story I am reticent to tell
Since concerns as to potential characterizations are fell
Here is a whistle
It has a bait that has awoken
To the fact of what is spoken
Meaning that as bait it was not safe
And managed somehow
To pick off the fisherman’s brow
The consternation about the situation
And prove it knew it self well could
What they had in mind that it should
And then also escape from
Three sisters in sarongs
Or was that before now then tell
Since if one refuses to instruct
She is likely to blather
About this and that and the other
Why until she has won
By accounting you at
Having known what her drivel was about
But don’t shout
Since she’ll turn that about
But then how
Since surely she is but a cow
Could she have taken those drops of consternation
And turned them into tastier bait than she
But if we are fishing
Who the hell are the fishes
Is the question to tell
Since she likes to answer it swell
And has had an inside the gob
Look about for her two bob
And fancies herself three quid’s worth of squid
For baiting the no-siders with
The sort of bait you take dearly
And rescue her our of the jaw of life
Since she’ll turn it around
And run you into the ground
By baiting you with flies
If she’s food for fish ties
Never explaining yet
Exactly how while a child
She landed an account against
Is it that she cognized
How to use herself as bait
To catch out right lies
So play a tune on her whistle of tin
She’s a Western Australian Landed sound
V is for victory
But begin
You may need to supply her
With peace in a pipe
Of bits and but
What happened
Was an early maximum security bite
Temporarily refuting her peace pipe
Bite being
A familial arrangement
And a threatening stranger
And twice told no ranger
But the quid for squid
Turned out only relevant
In that her sons selected replacement fishermen
Became so afraid
That He mistook Himself for the fish
So sold her out to
What a derangement
And security was maximally certainly
That unless the fisher-squid
Writes “hi: I never know what I did”
And she that to forget about
Or so she said
She’ll have to take
Him for the
Fishiest of fish
Yet for heavens sake
The fishermen did take
His consternation at squid fishing wrong
And sold out his bait to the throng
That somehow it has become
What is it they wanted, Her a One?
These imbecilic Australians
Was it not inevitable
The wrong would meet strong
And victory lost to the male
But if she’s nice and pliable
Any man’s muscle
Will melt her resilience to that trade
Still not explaining
Exactly how
The head at the top of the world
Bit into her shit
That she’s quite dearly and clearly
It


But what is this about!